Tangledstuck
by ugh
Summary: once upon a time there was a flower. if you sang to it youd have immortality or someshit. there was a witch who hogged the flower. the king found it and fed it to his sick queen. a little princess with magic hair was born. then she was kidnapped. eighteen years later a dashing dude found the princess in a tower. that was me. (originally on thecrossoverqueen on tumblr written by me)
1. introduction

once upon a time there was a flower

it was a sweet ass flower

who knows where it came from

the sun

the love of a child

aliens

anyway it grew up high in the mountains where it was treacherous for normal folks

but if you sang to it

youd have immortality or someshit

there was also a kingdom

and a king and queen ruled it

they were aight i guess

they were gonna have a kid too

but then the queen got sick

so the king thought

that sweet ass flower will heal my wifey

so all the kings horses and all the kings men went to go get it

but then there was a witch

she hogged the flower

what a bitch

sharing is caring

she kept it hidden for years

maybe centuries man who knows

finally the king found it

just in time too

they took it

mashed it

put it in a soup

and fed it to the queen

a few months later a little girl was born

and to a blue eyed and purple eyed couple

lets just say her green eyes made it a weird topic to bring up at family dinners

they saw that whenever they sang her hair turned yellow and looked like it was glowing

it was pretty sweet

a year later

a cloaked stranger came into the princess room

and took her

they searched for months

finally they had to give up

but not forever

on her following birthday they decided to send clouds into the sky

glowing clouds

they were pretty much floating lanterns that looked like clouds

also hella sweet

they hoped that when they sent them up every year, they would help her find home again

eighteen years later

here we are

and here i am hanging from a rope

dangling over a hella sweet ass tiara

hopefully itll get me an island

or at least an apartment away from my shitty roommates

who are currently holding the rope i am dangling from

but enough about me

lets get to the princess


	2. Life Begins, Condy Knows Best

"Bec! Becquerel, where are you hiding?" Jade calls out to her pet chameleon. "I wonder if you're at the window again." She ventures to the window swaying back and forth with her hands folded behind her. Her long yellow dress swishes over her bare feet, tickling them. "Ah-HA!" She throws open the window. She could see him behind the flowerpot, blending in against the gray paint. He's usually pure white, which is odd for a chameleon according to one of her three books. "Hmm… not here I guess." She takes a step away, and as soon as she sees him again, she scoops him up and exclaims, "Gotcha! You silly chameleon!"

Of course, he squirms in her grip, then falls limp, defeated. She gives him a small scratch on his belly and he comes to life again right away. He's the only pet she's ever had, and he's not messy so she can keep him as a secret companion. Her mother has never allowed pets in their tower.

"Come on, help me with these chores!"

He shakes his head and climbs up her arm.

"It's only seven oh-four in the morning and I've wasted too much time! Sweep, do the laundry, mop, try not to slip in the wax, then read while it dries up." Only a quick pause to think! "Bec, do you think I can fit another painting in here?"

He shakes his head.

"Well, something has to move then."

He taps her shoulder and points to the ceiling.

"No, I'm not painting over anything! I love my drawings too much. Well, I guess I could decide after lunch."

Nine o'clock and it's time to practice bass guitar! After that, do some baking, and then flute? When was the last time she picked up the thing?

After lunch, she couldn't remember what she needed to decide, so she decided to sew.

"Becquerel! It's not hide and seek anymore!" Distraught when she couldn't find him, she pouts and puts the red felt away. "You're no fun!"

He comes back out when she sets up to brush her hair. He loves cuddling in her hair.

"At a staggering seventy-two feet long, Jade's hair is the longest and most magical in the land!" she narrates in a deep voice, starting from the ends of her hair. This chore alone takes two hours.

It's around the time when she finishes when her mother comes home from work. Or… whatever she does! Jade had finished her chores just in time.

"Oh, Jaaaade! Let down yo' haaaaaiiiiir!" she calls from outside the window. Jade dashes over to the still-open window. Twisting her locks carefully, she tosses them over a hook outside the opening and watches as the rope falls down, down, down (sixty feet to be almost exact). Her mother catches it with one hand, twists it again into a loop, and steps on. Then, Jade pulls her up, up, up through the tower's window, a small basket in tow.

The Lady Condesce is a wiry woman who likes to wear fuschia, which matches her eyes. Her hair is a lot curlier than Jade's, but Jade's is darker. When it's not glowing, anyway. It is also long, almost to the ground. Jade refers only to this woman as "Mother".

"What, no welcome home?" she sneers.

"Oh, sorry! Welcome home, mother!" Jade enthuses. She folds her hands behind her back again, shifting her weight back and forth.

"Yes?" she says, turning towards Jade. "Didja need somethin'?"

"Well, it's kind of a very important day tomorrow. For me. You know?" She fiddles with her fingers.

She feigns a gasp. "It is!" She approaches Jade and strokes her hair lovingly. "It's the day I found ya, abandoned in the woods!" She fluffs up Jade's hair and walks away, reaching into her basket and shuffling things around. Probably dried fish. Jade loves the shellfish she brings home, not the boney ones. Yuck.

Jade pushes up her glasses and straightens her hair. She hates it when mother does that. She mumbles, "My birthday, yeah."

"Mumbling!" Her mother hates it when she does that. Jade joins her in front of the mirror, where she had already been peering in it closely. The daily face-stare. Suddenly, she clutches Jade around her shoulders. "Jade, look in this mirror. Do you know what I see?"

"No."

"I see a handsome, confident young woman. She has big things in her future. Wonderful things." Jade smiled. They're having an actual moment! "Oh look, you're here too!" Moment gone. "I'm just messin'! Don't be such a prude!" Her mother runs her hands over her own body and pauses over her hips. She sighs and strides over to her usual chair by the fireplace. "Your mother is tired. I need a good pick-me-up after today. Mama had to fight off bandits again." She pats her knee, signaling Jade to come over.

Jade runs over immediately, knowing that whenever her mother did the hair-glowy-thingy, she was a lot more willing to listen to requests. She plops herself down and starts singing the incantation she's known all her life, albeit in a much faster pace than usual. Her hair starts glowing brightly immediately.

Flower gleam and glow

Let your power shine

"Wait, slow down!"

Make the clock reverse

Bring back what once was mine

Heal what has been hurt

"Wha-!"

Change the fate's design

Save what has been lost

Bring back what once was mine

What once was mine

"Jade!" Jade turned around excitedly, sitting on her knees. Her mother stared at her incredulously, and as usual, with less wrinkles and a kinder disposition. Jade's hair slowly fades back to black.

"So anyway," Jade sputters, "since tomorrow is my eighteenth birthday, I figured that I could finally go and see the floaty things in the sky!"

"Floaty things?" Mother glances to the window, which was still open. Then, with an understanding smile, says, "Ah, the clouds. They're nothin' special, I ashore you. Besides, ya see them every day, don'tcha?"

"Well, I've studied clouds all my life, cumulus, cirrus, stratus, stratocumulus, altostratus, altocumulus-"

"Get ta the point."

"These are more like… emitting their own light?" Jade picks at her finger bands. "But they're in cloud shapes. I don't know."

"If ya don't know what they are, why go see 'em at all?" Her mother sits back in her chair, confident she has won.

"It's because I don't know! That's what's interesting! So please?" Jade puts on her puppy-dog face.

"No."

She adds a pout.

"Don't do that! You know it irritates me!"

"But why! It's so unfair!"

"Unfair?!" Mother suddenly throws her arms up and leans forward, closer to Jade's face than usual. "You have no idea what unfair is! You're not strong enough! Not old enough! If I let you go, you'll break and I don't know what I would do if you did!"

"But I-"

"I only keep you in this tower to make you safe!" She stands up dramatically in mid-phrase and glares down at her daughter. After a moment her expression changes to a softer one: dejection and acceptance. She runs a hand through her hair, gripping at her scalp. "But I guess I knew this was comin'. A day you'd want to leave your old, decrepit mother." She turns away, hugging herself.

Jade feels bad now. But Jade has been protecting herself against mannequins while wielding a frying pan. Does that count as being strong enough? She hopes it does.

Mother turns back and goes to Jade, softly placing her hands on her shoulders. "But soon you will be. Trust me, darling." She lightly bops Jade's nose with her index finger. "Mother knows best."

"When will I be-"

"It's a scary world out there, Jade! My sweet, innocent Jade." Mother cradles Jade's jaw in her hands. "Now listen, I know it might look safe from your window, but anything could happen! Something could go wrong, I just know it!"

"Like what?"

"Bandits!" Mother throws back her cape as she turns around, almost hitting Jade with several pounds of fabric. "I got attacked today! Bunch of thugs and ruffians, they were. But mother took care of them because she's strong. And not to mention the plants and animals that could eat you up alive!"

Jade's eyes widen in fear.

"There's poison oak, rockslides, Venus traps, bear traps, alligators! And the cannibals!"

"What are cannibals?"

Mother snatches Jade's arm and bites down on it. Hard.

"Ow!" Jade shrieks. Her mother lets go and Jade rubs her tender forearm.

"Cannibals," Mother punctuates, leaning in slightly.

Jade gulps.

"And the diseases, don't even get me started!" Her mother throws her arms up again, her cape accentuating the fearsome idea.

"No!" Jade gasps. She is afraid, but she can't help but wonder if Mother is being overdramatic to specifically play to Jade's own biggest fears.

"Yes!" Her mother makes fangs by putting curled fingers up to her mouth. "Men have sharp teeth, y'know. We women have to be wily. You… not so much." She sniffs and wipes away a tear. "I'm gettin' upset just thinkin' about you out there! But if you stay here-" she takes both of Jade's hands in her own, "-I'll protect you."

Jade smiles shyly. "So does this mean-"

"It means you're still not ready!" Her mother throws Jade's hands away and starts counting on her fingers. "You're naive, clumsy, sloppy, a little ditzy, but at least you're not gullible."

"Really?" Jade can feel her heart start to fill with hope.

"No. You are extremely gullible." Jade breathes out sharply and pouts. "Anyway, it also looks like you're getting a little chubby, too. Hmm, this is not good." She taps Jade's chin and tummy, and Jade covers both spots unconsciously. Chubby? "But it's not all that terrible! I'm just telling you because I love you! I don't want ya to hear it from a stranger and be devastated." She pulls Jade in for a hug and tightly wraps one arm around Jade's shoulder and the other around her head, fingers splayed across her face.

"Can't breathe, Mother," Jade rasps. Not only is her mother crushing her windpipe, her cheek is firmly planted in copious cleavage.

"I understand what you're goin' through," her mother says quietly without releasing her grasp. "So can you do one thing for me?"

"Yeah?"

Mother lifts Jade away from her bosom and looks into her eyes gravely. "Don't ever ask to leave our tower again."

Jade looks down, hunching her shoulders lowly. "Yes, Mother."

"Good girl." Her mother runs a finger down Jade's temple to her chin and lifts her face. "I love you."

"I love you more," Jade says with a weak smile. Her mother returns it.

"I love you most," her mother whispers, kissing the top of Jade's head. Jade feels like this is the first real moment they have shared in quite some time. The fuzzy feeling remains even after Mother moves across the room and starts unpacking her basket. "I just came to drop off the fish. Make sure to eat it soon. I have one last errand to run."

"What's that?"

"It's a surprise," she says with a wink and a smirk.

"Okay. I'll let down my hair," Jade says flatly.

"I'll be back soon."

"Okay." Lady Condesce leads the way to the window, and lets Jade toss her hair down. She grips it firmly, gives a small wave, and slides down carefully, a new basket attached to her elbow.

Jade watches as her mother disappears into the curtain of leaves in the cliffs. She sighs, letting her hair flow in the cool breeze. In the bright sunlight, the color dances between the darkest black and a medium brown. She thinks that it flaps like a flag, but she can't be sure. She's never truly seen one, after all. Becquerel emerges from his hiding place among the flowerpots and nudges himself under her hand. Jade smiles genuinely and gently pats his head.

"I wish you could speak, Bec."

Bec punches his front feet together threateningly. Then, he sticks a single talon in mother's general direction.

"She's not that bad."

Bec just shakes his head and gurgles.


	3. Horse With No Strider

"I could get used to a view like this," says Dave Strider, thief extraordinaire. Finally, the narrator arrives. His name, his reputation, and his sunglasses are legendary.

"Dave, stop narrating your entire life," one of his shitty roommates calls from across the roof of the castle. His name is Dirk. They may look like brothers, but they're not. Dirk is only a day older than Dave is, and they're probably fourth cousins three times removed at best. The only thing they have in common is loving the good life and wearing sunglasses at night.

Despite the comment, Dave is satisfied. "Yup. Now I'm used to it."

"We literally do not have all morning!" Jake hisses.

"Why, you got somewhere to go?" Dave snides, striding past him.

"Yes," Dirk cuts in. "The tropics. Now let's get the crown and get out of here."

Dave speeds ahead. "Come on, slowpokes, I've been waiting twenty years for this!" he half-shouts ironically.

They locate the throne room, where the tiara is conveniently displayed for everyone who comes in to see. Dave ties the rope around his waist tightly. When he gives the signal that he's good, Dirk and Jake lower him into the room. They lower him slowly. Careful… careful…

"Ach-oo!" one of the guards sneezes.

"Gesundheit," Dave says. "Allergies?"

"Yeah. Dust." The guard gasps and turns around just in time to see Dave be hoisted back up through the roof. "Hey!"

"Let's get out of here, guys!" Dave whoops. "Mission accomplished and it's only eight in the morning!"

"We helped too, you know!" Jake interjects sourly.

"Now all we have to do is escape the guards," says Dirk.

Before Dave can say something witty about being so slick they don't have to worry about guards, he hears the unmistakable whinnying of a horse. One, particular, extraordinary horse.

"Frick," he mutters, the bag with the tiara bumping against his hip.

* * *

><p>His name is Karkat. Full name Karkat Vantas. He is very proud of his name. His rider, Roxy Lalonde, captain of the guard, trained him specifically for this purpose. Chasing bad guys. Even from three weeks old, they were two peas in a pod. Both loyal, both worthy of their positions… the only difference is that one is smarter than the other. You guessed it: it's the horse. This is not to say that Roxy is incompetent, simply that the student has outranked the teacher.<p>

Unfortunately, horses aren't necessarily accepted into authority. Yet. He only leads the other horses. For now.

The culprits can't be far. They traveled on rooftop, and he hadn't smelled any new horses on the premises, so they must be on foot. At least two. Maybe three.

_Sniff_. Three. Definitely three. Two of them may or may not be lovers.

The squadron of soldiers are nearly upon the group of thieves. Karkat can smell the distinct scent of douchebaggery for miles around. One of them is a scent he is extremely familiar with:

David Strider.

Their history is brief, they've only met each other once, when they almost caught him while committing another crime. They had cornered him, but he escaped by pure luck. At least they got his face, even if they couldn't remember what his sunglasses looked like exactly.

But this time, they'll get them.

* * *

><p>"No, no, no, no, no!" Dave suddenly stops running and pulls off a wanted poster off a nearby tree. This is not good. "Not good, very not good!"<p>

"What is it now?" Jake asks, visibly annoyed by the interruption of their escape.

"The poster! They can never get my sunglasses right!" He holds up the poster to them. Can't they see the atrocity in the depiction of his mug? His sunglasses are his trademark, and not many have sunglasses as awesome as he does.

Dirk rolls his eyes. He also has sunglasses, but everyone gets them right because they're pointed in a stupid way.

"You guys look great!" Dave points to another poster on the adjacent tree, where Dirk and Jake are together. They look better in the poster, to be honest. Their sideburns are pretty epic, too. Thick and manly, both of them. Meanwhile, Dave... He rubs his chin with longing.

He looks back at the poster, where his glasses had been changed to the shape of perfect circles.

"Let's get the hell out of here," Dirk mumbles, the sound of horses growing near.

Dave shoves the poster in his bag and follows his roommates farther into the woods.

* * *

><p>"Do you smell 'em, Karkat?" Roxy asks.<p>

Karkat snorts in response. He's hot on their trail. Today is the day this whole chase ends.

Roxy doesn't need to steer, Karkat just needs to follow the scent. They continue to dodge trees left and right, even boulders. They get larger and larger until they come across a short line of cliffs. They weren't very high, but certainly not high enough to be scaled in a short amount of time

Karkat sniffs the air. He goes left.

"Come on, men! Two of you with me, the rest go to the right!" Roxy orders. "Cut them off at the top!"

"Ma'am!" they reply.

* * *

><p>The trio of thieves stop at the base of a cliff too steep to scale, but short enough to climb if you were ten feet tall.<p>

"Give me a boost," Dave suggests, turning to his comrades.

"Give us the bag," Dirk counters.

"Are you kidding me?!"

"We don't have all day," Jake says.

"Don't you trust me?" Dave asks, shifting his pleading eyes from one to the other.

"Since the juice incident, no," Dirk replies shortly.

"Ow," Dave whispers. "Harsh much?"

Both men stare at him.

"Fine!" He hands Jake the bag. They give him the boost he needs. He swings his leg over the edge, which came up to the middle of his chest while standing on the shoulders of a six-and-a-half-foot tall ruffian, and hoists himself the rest of the way. He pushes his glasses up and looks behind them to see three horsemen on horses catching up. "Well, seeya!"

"What?!" They are simultaneous in their response.

"What about us!" Dirk shouts.

"Sorry, my hands are full!" Dave shrugs, holding the bag with the tiara. He slings it over his shoulder as he takes off again, not looking back.

It's nothing personal, it's... Well it's a little personal.

* * *

><p>Karkat and Roxy come up to two tall thugs, cornered like rats. The third vanished a moment before in the flash of his red vest and very blond hair.<p>

Karkat slurs in his mind. He will capture him today, no matter what.

"Well, well, well," says Roxy, disembarking from Karkat. "Well. Well, well. Well, well, well, well. Well!" She turns to the darker one. "What's your name?" He swings a fist, but she dodges easily. "Fist? Okay! Mine is Roxy, and it's nice to meet you!" She grabs his wrist and swings him all the way around, making him crash into his partner in crime, sending them stumbling against the cliff side behind them. Leaning over the two, she says to the blond, "And you must be humiliated!" She kicks both in the face with her spurs.

Karkat had to admit that was clever. He waits patiently while she proceeds to chain them up and attach them to his companions' saddles.

"Men, get these two to prison!" she orders. She swats the horses' rears and they make wide turns in the direction they came.

"Remind you of Saturday night, Dirk?" the dark-haired one asks the blond with a smirk.

The blond gives a short scoff. "Not the time," he replies with a wink. Or what Karkat _thinks_ is a wink. His shades make it hard to tell.

"Come, Karkat," Roxy says, climbing onto the saddle on his back. "We got a straggler to hunt."

As soon as she said that, he gallops forth.

And not much after that, the two horsemen are out of sight.

But not two minutes later, they fall unceremoniously down a grass-covered ravine cloaked with fog. Roxy flies off about halfway down, but Karkat rolls all the way down to the bottom.

He scampers up, getting his bearings back on four hooves. Where did Roxy land? He's caught between searching for her and a dangerous criminal when he see broken branches and the scent of douchebag.

Roxy has said many times that she trusted him, but since this is the first time he's been alone, he decides to go with his instincts.

David Strider is going down.

* * *

><p>First he had to outrun a bunch of guards. Piece of cake.<p>

Then he had to survive a debilitating fall down a ravine disguised by fog and landing on his face. No biggie.

Now he has to hide from a more-sentient-than-normal horse the color of hell itself! Well, he's more of an auburn with a jet-black mane and tail, primped but fearsome.

And what's worse, he's not far behind.

Dave keeps running, darting his head back and forth looking for a tree to climb. He finds one and grabs hold onto the lowest branch. The gallops are getting closer as he races up the tree. He looks back for a second when he misses and tumbles down, hitting limbs left and right. Dave curses the whole way down.

Thankfully, he lands on something that isn't the hard ground. Instead, it's a hard saddle.

Trying his luck, he yells, "Hyah!" and hangs to the reins.

Immediately, the horse stops in its tracks. It rears its head and looks Dave dead in the eye. Jiminy Christmas, its eyes are red, too

"Come on, you dumb horse!" Dave shouts, banging his heels on the horse's sides. He's pretty sure that means "go" in horse language.

The horse looks at the satchel.

"Oh, no you don't," Dave warns. "This is mine. I stole it fair and square. Technically, you'd be stealing from me."

The horse rolls its eyes. Wait, what? It snaps at the satchel again and Dave flips out of there just in time. Or so he thought. He feels for the bag, but looks up to see it in the horse's mouth. He sprints at the horse, grabbing the saddle again, but only succeeds in getting dragged about ten feet. He skids in the dirt, ruining his favorite trousers and scuffing his boots, but gets the satchel back.

"Hah!" He lets go and takes off again, this time finding a curtain of leaves to hide behind. Desperate, he goes for it and catches his breath inside. The hoof steps fade away.

He is safe. For now.

To his left, he sees a source of light. It's dim, but definitely a cave. A cave is wet, and therefore harder for some rogue horse to track him down in. He follows the light.

The short trek to the other side of the cave reveals an oasis of some kind, a neat tower standing tall in the middle. It's surrounded by steep rocks, which Dave determines to be the perfect hiding spot from the guards.

He adjusts his satchel and spies a small creek. He rinses his face and drinks nearly a gallon before moving on.

Upon closer inspection, it's hella tall. Taller than it looked from a distance. He finds no stairs, no ladder, and even hits a few bricks just in case there was a secret passage. No dice. He scales it anyway, dagger in hand, lucky broken sword in the other. It got him out of a sticky situation back when he was a teenager, so he keeps it always.

It's not until he gets to the lowest window, the only window it seems, until he rests, catching his breath.

And it's not until he opens the window and steps inside until he realizes that this tower was too clean, too well-maintenanced to be abandoned.

He feels a hard, sharp pain at the back of his head, before succumbing to total blackness.


	4. So Much For Life Beginning

As soon as the stranger hit the ground, Jade yelped uncharacteristically. He went down hard, and all Jade could do was watch.

She lowers her frying pan slowly, cautiously, just in case he was faking. She prods his back with it. She swallows and skirts around to his face. She turns the frying pan around so that she's holding the pan side, and uses the handle to tilt his head and inspect his teeth. His sunglasses press against his face, askew.

Jade frowns. "Aren't men suppose to have pointy teeth?" she asks Bec.

Bec just shrugs.

"What do we do with him?" She notices a brown leather bag around his shoulder. She carefully removes it and puts it aside. Now to figure out what to do with a person.

Her room? Too obvious.

Mother's room? Even worse!

Under the stairs? Too dirty.

She eyes her wardrobe, comparing sizes. "Wardrobe it is."

While bending over to pick him up, she nearly slips on her own hair. Wow, he's really heavy! She actually has to put down her frying pan. Bec helps by lifting the edge of his vest off the floor.

She hoists him up, pulling his arm over her shoulder. He's a whole lot less heavy this way. She sneaks a glance at his face. It's then when she notices his deep breathing on her bare skin where her neck meets her shoulder. It's like he's sleeping. She blushes at the sensation continues her quest.

The first thing Jade does is try to open both doors with one hand. When she does that, she tries to sit him down in it. His legs don't quite fit, so she stands him up. Unfortunately, gravity is working today, and he falls before she can shut even one door, sending him crashing down on top of her and making her squeal again. She shoves him off and glares at the closet. She scratches her head because there aren't really many things in there, just three dresses and some unmatched shoes.

Maybe she _should_ show mother. Something tells Jade that her mother wouldn't take kindly to strangers, but if Jade tells the whole story, maybe her mother would realize that she's ready and let her go! A smile spreads across Jade's face, suddenly getting excited at the thought. She takes the unconscious man's hand and shakes it.

"Thank you, sir," she says quietly. She lets go and his arm falls limply to the cobblestone floor. Suddenly, his eyes flutter open, and in a panic, she knocks him out again. Oops.

Staring at the wardrobe again, she wracks her brain for ideas. The doors have handles, so if he falls out, she could just shove a chair under them. She has a chair that might be high enough in her room, so she races up the stairs and grabs it. The end part of her hair has not moved an inch.

Once again, she picks him up and haphazardly shoves him into the closet, closes the doors, and sticks the back of the chair under the door handles. Proud of her work, she nods and picks up her pan again.

She takes a deep breath. "Okay, I've got a man in my wardrobe," she mutters. She smirks to herself and starts swinging her pan between her fingers. "Not bad, eh, Bec?" As soon as she said that, she dropped the pan and it hit the ground with a gross clang. She dives for it and holds her breath, listening for groans from the wardrobe. She lets out a sigh of relief when silence follows. Bec just shakes his head and Jade huffs at him.

When Jade stands to dust herself off, she sees out of the corner of her eye that the bag had opened and something shiny was sticking out. She cocks her head and picks it out. The fragile-looking silver circle is really pretty. The three larger gems in the middle are the same color as her eyes. The rest of them are clearer than the stream that flows just outside her tower. It's definitely jewelry of some sort.

She gingerly puts it on her wrist and shows Bec. He shakes his head.

Around her neck? She shows Bec again, but he sticks out his tongue in disgust.

She tries the top of her head. She turns to Bec and shrugs. He crawls up onto the mirror. She looks at herself. In the past, she has snuck into her mother's jewelry box and tried them on, but nothing like this.

"Jaaaade! Let down ya haaaaiiir!" Her mother's voice startles her out of her spacing out.

She quickly stashes the jewelry and bag into a nearby pot. Bec hops in, too.

"I have a surprise for ya!"

"Coming!" she shouts. Then she mumbles, "Me, too..." She loops her hair over its usual hook and starts pulling when she feels a tug. When her mother is safely through the window, she says, "I have something to tell you."

"If it's about the clouds again, you'd betta getcha head out of them." She heads over to their stovetop and starts unpacking her basket. "I got your favorite for your pre-birthday dinner. I'm frying you some squid, how does that sound?" She sounds so happy. Jade doesn't want to potentially ruin it. She takes a deep breath.

"I want to tell you something! I think I can-"

"Seriously, though."

"But I-" She edges her way to the wardrobe.

"Enough."

"Please listen!"

Mother slams her hands down on the metal stove. "We are not discussin' this!" She whips around, making Jade jump. "You're not going to see the clouds, and you're not leaving this tower! _Ever!_"

Jade clenches her jaw and looks down and her toes. She grips her elbow and hunches her shoulders.

"Oh, great. I'm the villain. I'm sorry, Jade." Jade looks up to see her mother's face in her hand.

"I..." Jade stammers. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to push it so far. The human being in the wardrobe might just send her mother over the edge. "Paint."

"What?"

"I want that paint you brought. From the conch shells?"

Her mother lifts her head up and meets Jade's eyes. "Conch paint? It take three days just to get there. Are ya shore?" Her face is full of concern.

"Mm-hm. I like the whites and pales the best." Jade tries to give a reassuring smile.

"Alright." She stands up, her fuschia dress swaying with her, somewhat satisfied. She lights the stove and fills a pan with oil. She turns towards the staircase. "I'll go pack my things." As she passes by, she caresses Jade's cheek with two fingers. "I'll finish makin' your dinner before I go."

Jade sighs and nearly sits on the chair used to keep the person in the closet from falling out.

Their dinner is quiet. Jade can feel the guilt pressing down as they both clear their plates. The squid is delicious. She tries hard not to keep looking at the wardrobe.

When they finish, it's nearly three.

Jade hands her mother the packed basket. "Have a good trip," she says. "Be safe!"

"I'll see you in a week, darling." She gently kisses Jade's forehead. "I love you."

"I love you more," Jade answers.

"I love you most." Another stroke to the top of Jade's head and then she slips down to the ground below via hair travel.

Jade waits until her mother is out of sight before she rushes back to the closet, grabs her frying pan, and lets Bec perch on her shoulder. She removes the chair slowly, knowing that he could come tumbling down at any second. When he does, he lands on his face again, and Jade cringes.

She needs a plan. Tie him up. With what? Her hair? Not a bad idea. She sets him up in the chair and sets his arms on the armrests. His head falls forward, chin to chest. She decides to go for the arms first, securing them tightly. Then the legs, then his middle. She had to turn her gaze for that part. Now he's completely incapacitated.

Now what?

She pokes him, but he doesn't wake up. She thinks about using her frying pan again, but isn't sure if that would cause brain damage or not.

Bec taps her neck. She lets him off and he crawls to the man's shoulder, facing his head. His eyes dart over the human and he sticks out his tongue as a warning shot. Jade takes the opportunity to hide behind one of the thick wooden beams holding the place up. Bec flicks his tongue into the human's ear and he awakes instantly with a yelp and a jerk of his head, sending Bec seeking refuge on the back of the chair.

Moment of truth, Jade! she thinks to herself. She lets out her breath and summons her big girl voice while the human person mumbles to himself.


	5. Journey to the Floaty Light Things

Dave wakes with a start. It was like something small and slimy was in his ear. He checks by whipping his head around and few times, but there was nothing. He tried to move, but he was trapped. Was he having a waking nightmare? It's incredible how dark it is in here and suspicious how there's one sliver of light illuminating his person in what looks like a cobblestone circular prison. But then he saw that he could still move a little bit. He was just tied down by...

"Hair?" he mutters frantically. "Who even has this much hair?" He's tied to a green wooden rocking chair. Wait, nope, doesn't even rock. "The hell is going on?"

"It's no use struggling!" a feminine voice orders him from the shadows. He'd be turned on right now if he knew what was happening here. "Pointless to resist!" He pushes up his glasses and squints into the dark.

"Where am I?" he asks. And how do I get out of here.

"You don't know?" she laughs nervously. "You know exactly where you are." She steps into the light, holding a frying pan over her shoulder menacingly with two hands.

The first thing he notices is her hair. Jet black and very long, and impossibly, the same hair that has bound him to his chair. Her skin is pale, like she's never stepped outside, but she has freckles on her face and arms, like only those parts were even exposed to the sun at all. Her glasses are super huge, bigger than his own sunglasses. It's not until she gets only a few feet away that he notices her eyes are green behind those specs.

"How did you find me?" she asks sternly. That's cute.

He opens his mouth slightly, turning on the charm to level eleven.

"And who are you?" she adds. So cute. She's like a little interrogator.

"It does not matter how/And not how far I've come/But all I will say now is.../" he pauses for effect. "Sup." If he weren't tied up at the moment, he'd push back his bangs and lean in. "I'm Dave Strider."

She frowns and turns her head slightly, confused. You've got to be kidding me, he thinks. She blinks a few times before repeating her questions. "Who are you and how did you find me!" she raises her pan some more.

He sighs, defeated for the time being. "Okay fine." He takes a breath. "I stole a thing and so I'm being chased by guards and I was looking for somewhere to hide when I came across this place. Happy?"

"You're lying. You're here for my hair!" She points the pan at him accusingly.

"Oh, come on! I don't even know what I would do with that much hair! Make a wig? No thanks!"

"Wait, so, you're not after my hair?" she asks.

"That's what I said." What's the big deal? The only thing unique about her hair is the length. "All I want to do is get out of it." He attempts to move his limbs. "Literally." Wait. Where's the crown? He glances around, but it's nowhere in sight.

She tucks her pan under her arm and puts her hand on her chin, pacing about the place. "Bec!" she calls.

"My name isn't-" Before he could finish, she dips beside him and picks something up. Oh, she's talking to a pet. It looks like a lizard, but it's white. Aren't they supposed to be green or brown or something? She turns away, hunching over the thing in her hands.

"Do you think he could take us?" Is she whispering to it? "I know he's a man! But he doesn't have pointy teeth, so I don't know." He raises an eyebrow, deeply befuddled by what his eyes are telling him is the happen. Suddenly, she turns back to him, making him jump. "Alright, _Dave Strider_, here's the deal." She walks toward him and puts her lizard animal on her shoulder. "I have a prospect for you."

"Oh, dear."

"Take me to see the floaty light things." He narrows his eyes and cocks his head sharply.

"Pfft. Why should I help you?"

"Because I have your thing."

"My thing?" He scrunches his eyebrows. Then he realizes, "The crown?"

"Yes. I've hidden it." She crosses her arms smugly. "And if you take me to the floaty light things, I'll give it back."

He looks around again. Closet? No. Cabinet? Nah. There. "It's in that pot, right?" He chortles.

She raises her pan again.

"Oh, f-" _BAM!_

When he opens his eyes again, the same wet sensation in his ear returns. Out of the corner of his eye, he realizes it's the lizard.

"Stoppit!" he yells, rubbing his ear against his shoulder. Like that'll do anything. This time he feels the place where she hit him pulsing and pounding with his heartbeat.

"You take me to see the lights, and you'll get your crown back." She's gained a bit more confidence now.

"Just so you know, they're clouds."

"But they glow." She's explaining it to him like he's an idiot.

"Yeah, but they're for the princess."

"The princess?"

"She's lost. They do it every year for her birthday."

"Oh, like a gift?"

"Nah, more like a beacon."

"But she's lost! How will she know?"

"How the hell should I know? All I know is that it's on her birthday."

"What a coincidence. Tomorrow is also my birthday."

"Congratulations. But still, though, I have to let you know," he said that last part slowly. "I'm kind of a wanted criminal. I stole a tiara for pete's sake! We're not really friends, the kingdom and I. You know?" He shrugs.

It's her turn to narrow her eyes. She takes up her hair and approaches him again. "Even so, I've decided to trust you, if only for a day."

"Godawful decision," he mumbles.

"So trust me on this, _Strider_," she says this while yanking her hair towards herself, tilting the chair forward violently until she stops it, mere inches separating their faces. Dave only internally screams for half a second. "You can tear this place apart brick by brick by brick, and you will never find that crown without my help."

Dave just then realizes he has one more weapon left. "I guess I have no choice then." She smirks. "Here it comes." She frowns, confused, while he prepares his face for his ultimate male weapon: The Smoulder. It's when he makes a kissy face and raises an eyebrow. The ladies go nuts over it. However, when he actually does it, she's still frowning and actually looks angry. She glances down at the ground and scoffs, dropping the chair. He shuts his eyes tight, bracing for impact. This is such an off day for him.

The girl flips the chair on its back, with him still in it, and stands him back up with an unladylike grunt.

"So before we start on this bogus journey, why don't you tell me your name?" he asks.

"Jade," she answers hesitantly.

"Jade what?"

"Just Jade." She wraps some hair around her hand and whips it around him, untying him. Finally free.

* * *

><p>"You comin' or what?" he calls from below the window. He's climbing down the same way he arrived, Jade concludes. Frying pan secured under her arm and Bec on her shoulder, she nervously teeters on the sill, dress swishing against the tops of her feet and her achilles in the wind.<p>

She's so close she can almost taste it. She's a step away from the outside world but only half a step from going back inside and shutting the window and never even thinking about coming out again!

No! She has to do this. If she doesn't, she'll go back to wondering when her life would begin. "Here I go..." She takes a deep breath and tosses her hair over the loop, this time catching it so she could use the ladder herself. She holds that breath and takes her leap of faith.

Falling that sixty or so feet down the side of the building is so… so exhilarating! She whooshes past Dave and-

She grips her hair tightly at the last second, hovering just above the grass. Grass, as green as it was when she gazed from above, but not just green. It's brown where the blades reveal the dirt beyond, which she only sees when the breeze sways them back and forth. It looks cool and inviting and… safe.

Dave finally lands with a thud and a huff behind her. "Had enough of the outside world yet?" he teases.

She doesn't respond right away. She steps on the ground first. The blades collapse easily under her weight. It's unexpected, but the feeling makes her feel unnaturally giddy. She's grown flowers and fruits before in the tower, but never grass. "The grass is really soft."

"That reminds me, do you actually own any shoes?"

"I don't need any where we're going, right?"

"Uh..." He pauses. "I dunno, actually." He glances at her feet and back up, shrugging. "I guess not. Come on, let's go-"

She didn't wait for him to finish before she takes off running towards the leafy curtain-covered exit. The distance closes quickly as she puts all of her newfound energy into doing it. She shoves the curtain out of the way, revealing a dark crevice, and a small light. She races towards it, finally feeling free. Freer than she's felt since forever. It feels great. Really, really great!

As soon as she breaks through to the other side, she collapses in the grass purposefully. She stretches out in it, rolls over to her back, and sighs wistfully. She's not exhausted, not by a longshot. The sun shining through the high canopies feels good on her face, too. She closes her eyes and revels in the moment.

Then, a dark shadow obscures the light. Annoyed, she opens her eyes and is about to give the perpetrator a what-for, but stops.

"You dropped your frying pan," Dave deadpans. He's holding the frying pan between her and the sun, eclipsing it. He offers it, planting a hand on his hip.

"Oh," she says, wide-eyed and slightly embarrassed. She sits up and takes it, firmly grasping it with two hands. Bec nudges her cheek. "Good idea, Bec." She smiles up at him, gets up, and skips forth. "So which way do we go?"

"This way," he sighs. He comes around in front of her and leads the way into the trees. She follows, keeping track of the big trees, little trees, brown trees, white trees, leafy trees, bare trees… Then she sees it.

"Can we stop for a second?"

"What for?"

"That one."

"That one what."

"That tree is so..."

"So…?"

"So cool!" It's the thickest tree in the world, and the leafiest. The leaves are like a cloud covering the peak of a mountain. A thin mountain maybe. And covered with bark. It's kind of fat in the middle, too. The roots splay out, kind of like when she was younger, and she would pretend she was an octopus and her hair was the tentacles, spreading them out in eight sections all around her.

"What in the world is cool enough to rival myself?"

She takes her hair and tosses it to a branch and securing it. She climbs up on one of the large roots and exclaims, "This is!" She did this all the time in her tower, using the rafters to swing back and forth the main room with her hair. She wonders if she could circle the tree.

"Are you serious?"

She sways back and forth a few times, gaining sufficient momentum, and springs off the root. Her calculations were a bit off, since the branch sunk with her sudden weight, but the results are the same. She goes around the tree one-and-a-half times before she makes contact with the tree and pushes off again, now going around the tree three times until she runs out of hair. "This is so much fun!"

Every time she went around the tree, she found Dave in the same spot, leaning against the tree with crossed arms, glaring into the distance tiredly. He should really cut loose!

She repeated the cycle two more times before landing gracefully on the root she started on. "You should really cut loose."

"Me?" he asked, shocked and appalled. "I am the essence of cutting loose. The director, in fact. What you're doing," he gestures to all of her, "is just silly."

Jade rolls her eyes. "You're just jealous you don't have my hair."

"Nah, you can keep it. Besides, I can have fun without any silly gimmicks like long hair. My gimmicks are unique."

"Like sunglasses? It's been done."

"By who? I invented these."

She rolls her eyes again. "Let's keep going." She turns away and smiles to herself smartly. "I don't want to miss my own birthday."

He sighs again and leads the way again.

But suddenly, the bushes start rustling, triggering Jade to leap onto Dave's back while he struggles to find his balance. Was it ruffians? Thugs? Bandits?! She holds out her pan to the thick bushes.

Then, the enemy reveals itself.


	6. Journey to the Cuddly Grubling?

"Careful, there," Dave enunciates slowly. "I think they smell fear."

Jade, just noticing that she had clung to Dave like a child because a small frog had jumped out at them, scrambles off of his back and straightens herself up. "Sorry!" she apologizes quickly. Of course frogs aren't bandits! She laughs out loud to cover up her newfound awkwardness. "Let's go!" She keeps going in the direction Dave instructed, another audible sigh coming from behind.

As they walk in silence, thoughts begin to form in her head. She can't believe she did this. She smiles, amused at her own rebelliousness. She can't believe she did this! Maybe she should say it out loud.

"I can't believe I did this!" she says out loud, but not without laughing.

"What was that?" Dave asks.

"Mother's going to be livid." She puts both hands on her face, nearly dropping the pan again.

"Whoa, nearly dropped the pan, there."

"But that's okay I guess." She turns to a pond that she just noticed and kneels down to draw some water in the pan. After drinking some, she mutters "What she doesn't know won't hurt her?" She dumps the rest back and continues walking.

"What, none for me?"

"Stupid!" She claps the sides of her head a few times. "This is going to break her heart!"

"And you're not listening. Okay then."

She runs ahead and sees a clearing with a hill in the middle. Bec is barely hanging on, but he's used to that. Jade clutches her frying pan the entire way, realizing that running long ways like this is actually kind of exhilarating! She gets to the top and sees that her hair is about twice as long as the slope, so she drags some of it up, lays down, and rolls all the way back down to the bottom, laughing the entire way.

Bec reminds her with a tiny growl that she is carrying precious cargo.

"Sorry," she says softly, stroking Bec's neck and back. "Got carried away there, didn't I?" She untangles herself and joins Dave, who hadn't even attempted to go out into the sun. "Isn't this so much fun?" she asks, panting from the running.

He just shrugs and peels himself off of the tree he was leaning against moments before.

"What?" She shrugs, palms facing up and pan tucked neatly under her arm.

He doesn't answer and leads the way again. She follows again.

They continue in silence for another few minutes, and then the thoughts come back to haunt her. "I am the worst daughter on the planet."

"I can think of a few worse."

"I should just go back, right?"

"Already?"

"I can't!"

"Alrighty then."

"I'm never going back!" she says with sudden resolve, gesturing with her arms to make a big "X", and not to mention visibly frightening Bec and causing him to tumble off her shoulder and hang on to her short sleeve.

"I think Bec wants us to go back and get the tiara thing."

"Ugh, I'm so despicable!" She hunches her shoulders and collapses into a bed of daisies that just happened to be there.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"I'm laying in a bed of daisies." Her voice is muffled by the cool dirt, but she thinks he could understand.

She hears him sigh and his boots squeaking, like he's bending down. "I can't help but get the vibes that you have conflicting feelings about this topic."

She gets to her knees and sits on her ankles, staring at the disturbance she made in the flowers. She feels bad for messing up their home.

"Now, I'm putting the pieces together in my mind but," he pauses, "something tells me you were very isolated growing up, with only your mom to trust, who just happened to be slightly overprotective of her child. That, combined with the typical teenage taboo of forgoing on a forbidden foray, and you get the good kid turned troublemaker."

"What?" She blinks and faces him, very confused. He's speaking English, but she only kind of gets what he's saying.

"Translation: This is normal, serious, growing-up stuff. Everyone goes on adventures now and again, so don't worry about it. A little rebellion never hurt nobody. And you're doing okay."

She sniffs slightly, touched by his vote of confidence.

"Mostly okay."

She scrunches her eyebrows, about to take the thought back.

"Believe me, I know this stuff."

"But won't this break her heart?"

"Trust me on this: Yes."

"She doesn't deserve it, though!"

"Probably not. It's soul-crushing stuff."

"Soul-crushing, too?" She lets her jaw drop, then hunches over.

"Yup." She feels her arm being lifted and stands up with it. "My heart aches for this hoopla." He pats her shoulder. "That said, I regret to inform you that you have been let out of the deal."

"What?! Why?" she demands.

"It's no big deal, really. We could just turn around and go right back, I get my stuff, you can be back with your mother and your happy-go-trusty relationship, and we part as unlikely acquaintances."

"No!"

"Oh, come on! Just give me the satchel!" He gestures so wildly that his sunglasses nearly fly off. "What's it gonna take, man?!"

She points her pan to his chest with two hands and an intense glare. Dave immediately gets into a defensive pose. "Don't make me use this."

"Fine."

* * *

><p>Threaten him with a pan, will she? Dave thinks to himself. Well, he's been knocked out twice by that thing already, so who's he to not heed what she says? Wait, was it three times? No, he's pretty sure it was only twice.<p>

In any case, the absolute worst that can happen is fulfilling his plans a little later than planned. There will be no roommates to share with, since they probably got arrested this morning. Besides, with the remaining two-thirds, he can just buy more money. Or at least some type of instrument so he wouldn't look like a ruffian with a suspicious sack of money. He'll need a chest first, then a cart to carry that. But then he'd be a ripe target for bandits and thugs who-

That's it.

If this girl is nervous around a stranger and an amphibian, Dave can imagine her in a whole room full of 'em.

All he needs is a den of thieves.

"Tell you what, Jane," Dave says.

"Jade," she corrects him.

"Whatever. How about we take a break? I know a great place, clean and bandit-free." No promises there won't be ruffians, but she looked like she cared more about the lack of bandits than anyone else. "Its name even has appeal: 'The Cuddly Grubling'."

"I don't know," she mumbles. She places her hand on her chin and stares at the ground.

"They have great food?"

"Well, if you say so." She looks up at him with a comforting smile. "I trust you!"

"Still a horrible decision." He leads her by placing a hand gently behind her and guiding her in the right direction. He knows it's close by. They come upon a sign that reads, "The Cuddly Grubling 2 km". "Ah, there we are."

No less than two kilometers later, they arrive at the place, a hole-in-the-tree building that badly needs some renovations. He's been in there quite a few times over the past month. In fact, it's where he found his roommates last year. Also a horrible decision. So does he have any right to judge this girl for decisions to trust someone they just met? Probably not.

"Welcome to 'The Cuddly Grubling'!" he announces, gesturing his hand. She looks a little wary, but he reassures her as they climb up the steps. "It's a place only its builder would love, but I guarantee that the inside is just as great as… well, you'll see." He pushes the door open as wildly as any ruffian of his stature could muster, and it bangs loudly against the wall on the inside.

He sneaks a glance at Jade, who is wide-eyed and frigid, but only for a moment. She holds out her frying pan defensively as Dave ushers her through the crowd of ruffians and thugs.

"It has its charms, I think," he comments to the guy on his left. He had a lazy eye, so who knows if he was staring at him or-

"That's, uh, a lot of hair." Both he and Jade turn to look behind them as one thug with two ornate, but impressive peg legs picks up her hair with two hands, inspecting it. She squeaks and snatches it from him, collecting the rest in one huge ball with a single arm. Her other arm still holds out the pan.

"I thought you said there wouldn't be bandits!" she whispers to him harshly.

"I didn't say there were bandits, just people like you and me who are just rough around the edges!"

"You never said any of that!"

"I didn't?"

"Who are you calling 'rough around the edgeth'?" a big one with one fake red eye demands. Does he have a lisp? Wow, that is rich.

"Really, guy, I meant it endearingly."

"He looks furmiliar," one that is clearly trying to imitate a cat says. No words for that one.

"Isn't he that guy?" one with a scarf made with chain mail says. Dave wants to call him weird, but he doesn't want to get strangled with said scarf.

"Let me see," a voice says, pushing through the crowd. She has a hook for a hand, and it has spikes on it. She pulls out a piece of paper from her back pocket and unrolls it, comparing the faces. She squints and holds it up next to Dave's face. "Well, men?" They all nod with uncertainty.

"Let me see that," Dave interjects, reaching for it. The hooked ruffian holds it out of his reach and takes it to the nearest table next to a torch and slams it down. Her hand covers his face where it really matters: the sunglasses. He pushes her fingers out of the way. This time, the lenses are heart-shaped. "Now that's just stone-cold mean." Why is it ALWAYS the sunglasses?

"It's him!" one with a raspy voice yells, grabbing one of his arms. Oh, crap.

"There's even a reward!" hook-hand exclaims, snatching his other arm.

"It doesn't say alive or dead," one with a whip on her belt points out with a sinister grin.

"Come on, guys, let's talk this out," Dave says, trying not to panic. He catches Jade's eye and she's trying not to freak out, too. He's going to have to break his promise. No clouds, no crown, no private island. He feels one foreign hand brush against his butt. "Hey, watch where you're handling me!" They ignore him and two more take his legs and pick him up towards a wall. Hook-hand must have let go at some point, because the next thing he knows, she's standing in front of him, ready to take his eye out with her hook. In the commotion, he loses sight of Jade. She must have run off. Good for her. Best decision she made all da-

WHACK! It sounded like a pan hitting a hard ruffian head.

"Stop!" Jade shouts above the noise. Oh, great, did she just try to rescue him?! He shoots her a look that says, "Run, you idiot!" but she doesn't get the message. They all stop anyway. Hook-hand whips her head around, glaring. "Let go of my guide! I need him to take me to the floaty cloud things tomorrow!" She did not just say that in front of people. "It's been my dream since I was a little girl, since I've only seen them on my birthday and all… So please, let him go! Haven't any of you ever had a dream? Maybe you're living it, I don't know! But please, let him go so I can try to live mine." She breaks out the pout-face. These ruffians would be true thugs if they reject her.


	7. Dreams and Running

"I had a dream, once," the peg-leg one pipes up. Everyone turns their heads towards him.

"Me, too," hook-hand interrupts. "Hi, remember me? I'm Vriska." She put her hook over her chest as she said that.

"Hi, Vriska," everyone else seems to say simultaneously, monotonously, and rolling their eyes.

"And my dream was to become the most feared pirate queen in the seven seas." What is even going on. "I know it's not the greatest dream to have since I don't even own a boat, but someday…"

"Mine was to be her first mate, but uh…" he trails off, looking at his pegs. Why. "I've got a new dream now-"

"I've got a dream to be a world-famous hunter," the cat-looking one adds. It keeps happening. She shows off her collection of pelts on her person, naming off the animals she killed so far. "This one was a ferocious bun-beast, with sharp claws and a vicious grin…" She goes on, but others join in, giving Jade a turn about the room and all the dreams that he never noticed were in the room before. Had they even been in here the whole time?

"I've got a dream that I could be a lawyer, but I can't read," one with a walking stick says. Dave is pretty sure she's blind, too. "And if one person says I can't do it because I can't see, you just wait!" Jade just warily nods in approval. "I can still kick butt!" She waves her stick, but she's facing a wall. It's comical, to say the least.

One-by-one, the thugs start letting go of Dave as they join in the conversation about dreams. He has to give her credit for that one, he thinks as he smiles to himself.

"Kanaya over there does clothes and interior design," the raspy-voiced one says, pointing to a regal-looking lady waving back in the corner. One of the ruffians collapses across the room from Kanaya and makes one of the paintings behind her tilt. She immediately turns and fixes it. Someone's stingy.

Dave is freed when the big, one-red-eyed one lets go and approaches Jade. "Gamzee over there…" He points to a half-naked man with wild hair and a spacey grin. His staring kind of gives Dave the creeps. He glances at Jade, who feels the same way. "We're not really sure what his dream is."

"So don't just write us off for being thugs-" Vriska is interrupted.

"-and ruffians!" adds the lawyer one.

"-and ruffians," Vriska says, rolling her eyes. "Because we are all like you: people with unattainable dreams." She snuck a glance at her pegleg friend as she said that.

Dave speaks up. "That's cool and all, but we really have to skedaddle-"

"What's your dream, outlaw?" Vriska interrupts. Both she and Jade turn towards him, and then all of them turn.

"Outlaw?!" the lawyer one repeats excitedly with a toothy grin.

"Down, Terezi," Vriska commands. "The day will come." She turns her attention to Dave again. "So shades, what's your dream?"

"I'm not telling," he deadpans.

The reaction is immediate: swords threatening to skewer him alive if he didn't spill.

"Yeah, I got a dream, but first it goes a little like this: This is the story all about how/My life got flip-turned upside-down/Now y'all had better sit/It'll only take a minute/I'll tell you how I got to be mixed up in long hair." All they do is blink, even Jade. "In the castle I was hangin', strung up by my bros/Got a crown, escaped some clowns/With my shades, lookin' cool./ When all of a sudden this crazy horse, yo/Musta gotten some vendetta for me, who knows?/I hid in a cave who knew where it led/I got smart and found a-" Jade waves her arms and shakes her head quickly, as if to not say where he found her, and he pauses. "-a girl/She said, 'You take me to the clouds, or face the wrath of my hair!' / So I tell her, like, clouds? What, are you daft?/And she said 'cuz it's her birthday, she should at least get that/So as soon as we're done and I take her home/I turn tail and go, 'and now to the tropics!'/So, hello lotsa money, and goodbye snow!" He adds a smirk and a nod after he finishes, despite knowing that that was probably the worst freestyle he's ever done, and the intense want to crawl under a rock until everyone in this room dies and everyone forgets this incredible debacle.

"That was pretty, uh… anti-climactic," the one with the fake legs says.

"I have to agree with Tavros." Vriska shrugs. "Kinda sucks, to be honest."

"Hey, it may not be as touchy feely, but it's still my dream," Dave growls. He's getting really tired of people shitting on him all the time.

* * *

><p>Karkat sputters again, losing the trail yet again. How the hell can a human disappear like that?! Is he losing his sense of smell in his old age? This constant cat-and-mouse game through the forest, going around in circles, is really making Karkat dizzier than he would like. So far, he has seen zero humans besides David Strider, and he's also picked up some very, very long black strands, which is strange because his target has short, blond hair. Is he traveling with an accomplice?<p>

"Oh my, a steed!" a woman's voice calls from behind him. He jumps straight up in the air, startled greatly, and lets out a short whinny. He turns and faces her head-on, and sees that the curly-haired woman is unarmed, except with a basket. "Where is ya' rider?" she asks with amusement. Then when she glances down, her expression turns into pure terror, and some of her hair actually turns white in front of his very eyes. "Where is your rider?"

He blinks and cocks his head, unsure of what he just saw. Then again, he's a mostly-sentient horse, so this really shouldn't surprise him in the slightest.

"Jade!" she suddenly exclaims, and then makes a complete turnaround and takes off running.

What a strange woman, Karkat thinks to himself. However, thanks to that strange woman, he has found a path with a sign that reads, "The Cuddly Grubling 2 km", and gallops forth.

As he gets closer to the building (rather, a tree that looked like someone froze a tornado in time after it destroyed an entire neighborhood), his senses start to go off, indicating that David Strider was inside. Karkat frowns and charges on, not noticing his owner approach the door at the same time.

"Karkat!" Roxy cries. He turns to see his rider, covered in dirt no less, and visually unharmed, fast-walking towards him.

"Am I glad to see you!" he whinnies.

"I'm okay, now," she says, stroking the side of his neck and patting it. She runs her nails through his coat, too. He huffs, letting her know she should stop before he starts acting like a spoiled canine, and motions to the entrance to The Cuddly Grubling. "Do you smell them in there?" she asks. Them? "Good horse! We have reinforcements en route, so we have to wait a little bit." She sighs and looks out to the forest, the sun ready to set in about an hour or two. Karkat is impatient, but does the same. "I really underestimated the guards that were supposed to take the two felons to jail. They apparently knocked out both guards, took their clothes and one of the horses and got away. Can't find good help nowadays, huh KK?"

Typical, he agrees. He huffs in response.

Soon after, they hear the inside go quiet and then a rhythmic speech. He can't hear the specifics, but it's an incredibly annoying-sounding voice, and based on the crowd's silent response, he can tell it wasn't good.

Then five minutes later, the cavalry arrives.

"Show time," Roxy says to Karkat with a wink.

"Let's get this over with," he neighs.

* * *

><p>Before they could even get a refreshment, the doors burst open suddenly, making Jade jump. She looks around and sees that nobody else has jumped, so she assumes that it happens all the time. She looks to the door and sees some people in uniforms led by a yellow-haired woman and a horse walk in. Are horses even allowed in he-<p>

As she rounds the bar, she is suddenly yanked down and a hand clamps over her mouth. She struggles, but then recognizes Dave's signature red trousers and stops.

"Don't talk," Dave whispers in her ear. She nods and he lets go. With her eyes, she follows the trail of hair coming from her head and sees that most of it is in a pile by the bar, like it's been moved so many times it became a hassle.

"Where is Dave Strider?" demands the woman. "By the order of the royal guard, we need to find him and arrest him."

Jade shoots Dave a look. So he really is a criminal! That'll teach Jade to trust her instincts against people who she can't even see their eyes, particularly behind dark shades!

"I told you," he mutters. "How do we get out of here?"

"Who?" asks Vriska.

"Dave Strider: wanted criminal in two kingdoms, most likely traveling with two other companions, who may or may not be lovers, and he is armed," Roxy says.

"Ah yes, Dave Strider." Jade's heart almost stops. Is she going to betray them just like that? What if they're both arrested? What if they go to jail and find out that her hair is magical and try to kill her for it?! Mother's never going to forgive her if she comes back without saying goodbye to begin with. "He's right over there by the impeccable paintings, sitting on the broken accordion." Jade resists all urges to peer over the counter and see what's going on. "It's a good thing they didn't find the loose boards behind the counter, right Tavros?"

"Yeah! We uh, knew so we kept him away," Tavros adds.

What is happening? Jade thinks to herself. She shifts her weight from her squatting to cross-legged, and the floor creaks softly. Oh, now she gets it!

"Last time I checked, that's where your office is, right Nepeta?"

"Yup!" she chirps. "Very messy and smelly." She mumbles something after that, but all Jade could understand was "blood" and decided to just let it go. She nudges Dave and gestures to the floor. He nods with understanding.

"Technically a sewer," Vriska adds.

"What about the other two?" Roxy asks.

"Dunno about them. They probably went to use the john outside. _Together_."

After a short pause, Roxy orders, "You four, out," and the sound of two pairs of feet on the wood floors head outside. "Karkat, with me." One human set of two clicking boots and one set of four hooves start to walk away.

"Rum, anyone?" Vriska calls. A flurry of large ruffians and thugs huddle by the counter and start shouting out exotic sounding drink names. This is their chance to open the door and get out! "Coming right up!" She joins them behind the counter, pulling a weird-looking lever, and simply lifts the loose wood panel up to reveal a tunnel, not a messy office. "Go, follow your dream."

Jade smiles. She is eternally grateful to her now. Maybe thugs and ruffians aren't so bad after all! That's two things now that mother was wrong about.

"Yes, ma'am," Dave answers.

"Your dream sucks," Vriska spits. "I was talking about hers. Oh, and I grabbed your hair for you, and damn, was it heavy. You must have one heck of a neck."

Jade shrugs. "It's not so bad. I must have gotten used to it." She's really only had it in one long section, and never in a haphazard pile she can't brush through in more than a day. It has happened a few times though, where she left her hair in such a mess that it took mother twelve hours to get through it all.

"Let's go," Dave says, grabbing half of the huge clump with one arm. "After you," he says, gesturing to the big hole in the floor.

"Thanks," Jade says, slowly lifting herself to a crouch. She guesses that the nearest place to land on is about three feet away, so she hops right in.

* * *

><p>"Wait a minute," Roxy mumbles. "I knew I recognized every single face in here!" This is about the same time that Karkat sees it, too. They are currently in the midst of the most notorious gang in the kingdom. They don't have an established name, because every village and town she had come across investigating them has a different name for them. Roxy refers to them as trolls, because trolls live under bridges and annoy you with silly riddles that she has no time to solve. The same with the gang itself, they are so indirectly involved in the crimes, it's hard to pinpoint what they've done and convict them for it. Karkat just refers to them as buttmunches.<p>

"You can't prove a thing!" one thug shouts to the thug next to her. The one next to her shifts her gaze from the wall to Roxy and Karkat's general area. Is she blind? "Where's your warrant?"

"We're the royal guard, we don't need one," she snarls, annoyed. He's never seen her this impatient, even when he was acting like an ass in his colt days. "Karkat, show 'em how it's done!"

Karkat cracks his neck and gives her his version of a salute: a nod and a snort. He leans way down and starts sniffing the ground for a trail. He circles the room, narrowing down the path. Two medium-sized thugs are in his way, so he shoves them aside easily. He tracks the trail down until he gets behind the bar. As he suspected, there is a secret room underneath the loose board. He rises up, and some of those very long strands of black hair he picked up along the way stuck to his snout came with him. He shakes them off and stomps on the loose floorboard. It splinters under his strength, but doesn't break.

"Good job, Karkat!" Roxy leaps over the bar with one hand. "Now how do you work this thing?" She bends down and tries to pry the board up to no avail. With one huge grunt, she falls backward. "Damn!"

Karkat rolls his eyes and glances around, looking for a lever or button of some kind. Sometimes his rider just needs a little guidance. It's not that she's stupid, she just acts like a moron sometimes. He finds a lever with a picture of the animal on the sign in front (which he can only assume is a "grubling"), wraps his hoof around it, and pulls down. Miraculously, the floor opens to reveal a dark tunnel.

"Nice," Roxy mutters. She addresses the rest of the room. Before she can talk, one of the guards approaches her.

"Captain Lalonde, this guy claims to be Dave Strider," he says, holding an outlaw by his collar to present him to Roxy. This is the same one that was sitting on the accordion. By this time, the four guards she sent outside had come back in, shaking their heads.

"Ya got me!" the crazy-haired exclaims, holding up his arms like he was going to be arrested.

Roxy just rolls her eyes and says, "Just toss him aside. The posters I drew should be enough evidence to prove that this isn't him." She sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose and turning back to the tunnel. "You're mine now, Strider," she says to herself quietly. "Men! Let's go!" she commands, jumping into the tunnel.

Like the amazing partner he is, Karkat follows close behind.


	8. Escape, Or Not

Running? That's easy. Running with an armload of hair that shouldn't be this freaking long to begin with? That's hard. Right after they hopped into the hole, Dave asked why she hadn't just cut it regularly like a regular person, she said it was a long story. He didn't pry and focused on running.

After about half a mile, the tunnel goes from a dim torchlit ambiance to a slightly brighter torchlit and more ominous torchlit ambiance, and the sounds of metal armor clacking against itself filled his ears. It's not a good sound to hear while running in firelight, that's for sure. He cranes his neck when he hears galloping and sees a small crowd of soldiers and a horse coming after them.

"Yo, Jade," he calls. She doesn't turn, pumping her arms, pan in hand. "Can we pick up the pace a little? We've got company."

"Okay!" she pants. "I see a light up ahead!"

"Go for it!" They reach the light before the soldiers do, but it's quite literally a dead end off a short cliff and into a stream below. Across the stream, there are some people working on some construction of some dam, and beyond that, another slick cliff face, conveniently dripping with water from the forest above. To the right, the actual dam. To the left, an endless road of streaming water that curves out of sight, which may or may not have a barrage of soldiers waiting for them there. They're trapped. Like rats.

"Look, a cave!" says Jade, yanking his sleeve and pointing at the bottom of the cliff across the stream. "We could hide there!"

"As soon as we can get there." He hands the bundle of hair in his arms to Jade, who promptly drops it on the ground. Immediately offended, he says, "What are you-"

"I'm making a rope." Suddenly, it all came back to him what happened to him a few hours ago. "This might take a bit. We did an awful lot of running and walking around in the Cuddly Grubling. I wouldn't be surprised if someone stepped on my hair once or twice and I didn't notice."

Dave can hear the soldiers' shouts approaching. "Well, better hurry, they're catching up quick." Without skipping a beat, she hands him her frying pan. "What the hell am I supposed to do with this?" He takes it, unsure as to how the thing is supposed to work.

"Defend us! I'm almost done!" She continues to prance around with her hair in hand.

"I have a sword, you know."

She stops what she's doing to briefly inspect him. "You do?"

"Yeah. In my _satchel_. Which I _don't_ have."

She raises her eyebrows, then points behind him. "Dave, behind you!"

He turns. There it is, the clippity cloppity of the horse hooves coming to a stop. That horse must have outran the others.

"Done!" she shouts. The horse eyes her. Then he looks back at Dave with judging eyes.

"Don't look at me like that!" Dave replies. How dare he think so low of Dave like that.

"Karkat, why didn't you wait?" The captain of the guard says, finally making her way onto the scene. The horse reaches for his rider's hilt, grabs her rapier's handle by its teeth, and holds the blade tip out to Dave. "Hey!"

Immediately after, the horse starts whipping the sword around in its snout like it's been practicing for years. Dave blocks each pointed attack with the frying pan, yelling, "This! Is! Stupid!" He risks a glance behind him and sees that Jade has already used her hair as a swing and holding the end of her hair out to him. He then sees the captain of the guard making her way over to Jade. He sidesteps and blocks her path with her own horse every time, but she's getting wilier.

"Dave, come on!" Jade shouts.

"Uh...!" he responds. Then, "Forget it!" He hurls the pan at the captain's face while she's distracted by Jade's call, and hits the side of her head, and the rebound sends the pan flying straight up in the air, hitting her again and knocking her out. He wanted to laugh, but he also wanted to live, so he grabbed Jade's rope/hair, picks her up damsel-in-distress-style, and jumps. Together, they swing to the bottom, snapping boards along the way, destroying the hard work of the construction workers below, who had apparently already scattered at the sound of metal on metal fighting.

"Are we safe yet?" Jade asks, tugging her hair down and trying to gather it as carefully as she could.

He faces the dam as it breaks apart right in front of him, like opening floodgates. Literal floodgates. Great. "Not yet." He takes off his sunglasses and tucks them into his boot. "This just got complicated." He faces her and says, "Let's get to that cave."

Jade is slightly startled, but nods and snatches the rest of her hair with two hands. "Over here!"

They both run to the cave.

* * *

><p>As exhilarating as all this running is, it's no fun when there's imminent danger afoot! Jade doesn't look behind her as she and Dave run to the cave. Drops of water begin to fall all around and puddles start to form, getting her dress dirty as she splashes through them. Finally, they reach the cave and some huge boulders block the cave's entrance. Wait, boulders?!<p>

Suddenly, it's dark. So dark she can't see. There must have been other rocks to block the entrance, but there's still water coming into the cave. She can tell because she can feel the water rising to her knees already. Are they going to die in here? Jade gulps and pushes up her glasses.

"I'll find a way out," Dave says. She hears splashing and he bumps into her. "I found the rest of your hairblfgf-" he coughs, the water almost to her hips now. "Hang on." He takes a deep breath and goes under. He comes back up, then goes back down, then back up again, catching his breath as the water ascends to her waist. "Damn it!"

"Are you okay?" Jade asks.

"It's just a flesh wound."

"I'm so sorry," she says, hunching over. The water reaches her chest now, so she straightens up.

"No, it's my fault," he corrects her. "It was my reputation that made us run." She gasps when she feels him lifting her up on some rocks to stand on. She puts her hands up instinctively, feeling around for a ceiling, which is a few inches from the top of her head. She also feels him do the same thing, even though the rock is really small. The proximity makes her nervous. "It's confession time, I guess. I'm an orphan."

"Oh, no! That's terrible!" Jade pauses. "I have a confession, too."

"Really?" He makes a short laugh.

"I lied when I said my hair was a long story." She water is coming up to her chest again, so she might as well tell him if they're going to drown anyway. Bec crawls out to her shoulder and nudges her neck lovingly. She strokes his head and back. "My hair glows when I sing and-" She widens her eyes. "My hair glows when I sing! I can't believe I forgot!"

"Wait, what?"

"Flower gleam and glow, let your power shine!" She takes a deep breath as she uses the last of the air in the cave. Then it happens. The yellow light fills her vision and she sees her hair flowing to another spot in the cave. She looks to Dave and points while he stares at her hair. She frowns and hits his shoulder in slow motion, swimming down while her hair still has some light left.

They both start pulling rocks aside, making the water flow between them, and air bubbles come through. Then, the light starts to fade. The process always seemed so slow when she made it glow at home, but now time is precious and she doesn't want to waste a second. They try to go faster and then everything goes dark again. Her lungs burn for air. She's pretty sure she has lost all of her nails by now.

And when all hope seemed lost, she hears a thud and a lot of crunching and cracking. The water starts pulling her through the hole they made, so she quickly takes her glasses off and curls into a ball. The sound of rushing water and the feeling of being dropped like a ball into a larger body of water indicates that she could open her eyes again, so she does, and sees sunlight and underwater plant life. She scrambles to the surface and gasps for precious air. She finds a place to stand on in the water, and puts on her glasses in time to see Dave coming through the waterfall. He comes up for air, panting loudly. He meets her eyes, then starts laughing. She smiles and laughs, too.

"Ow!" he yells suddenly. He brings his hand up to his face. It's bleeding. He gives her a look and she realizes it's probably a good idea to get to shore.

Jade gets to shore first, crawling at first, and draws her hair from the small river. It's a pain when it's wet, so she has to wait until it's dry before they can move on. She finds Bec near the end of her hair, still hanging on. She offers her hand and he hops on up to her shoulder. She does the same for Dave when he swims ashore.

"Her hair glows!" he gasps when he sees her hair again. "Your hair glows!" he says to her. He looks at Bec. "Her hair glows!" She glances at Bec, who is staring at Dave, tail in a tight curl. "Why is he staring at me like that?" He takes her hand and she helps pull him up.

Jade just shrugs.

* * *

><p>"Halt, men!" Roxy orders. Karkat is not a man, so he doesn't halt. He finds another way down.<p>

He hops onto the ground below, but doesn't notice the dam breaking until he hears the crackling of wood being pulverized. However by that time, it's too late and he's being swept away. Before that, he saw David Strider and the girl running into a cave. What idiots. Even Karkat knows that running into a cave during a flood is a horrible idea. If they don't drown in there, then he'll find them.

"Karkat!" Roxy calls, breaking his train of thought. "Grab the rope!" He looks up to see his rider throwing a rope in his direction. He starts to swim toward it, but the current's too fast. She throws again, but again it's not enough. "Karkat! No!" She strips her coat, but the other guards hold her back. The water blocks out her words, but he knows she can't survive if she jumps in after him.

A rock hitting his ankle sends him into full distressed mode. It's a front leg, so he could work around it, but if he doesn't get out of the rushing water soon, the injury spells his death.

The rocky cliff walls give him no hope, but he does see a grassy area coming up, and flails to shore. He makes it, collapsing into the soft, muddy grass onto his side. The sun is going down, so he takes the opportunity to take a nap before going back to work.

* * *

><p>Gamzee stumbles out of the Cuddly Grubling, broke. Again. Oh well, his bros have his back, so it's all good 'til tomorrow. He squints into the sunset's orange light coming through the trees, mumbling, "Beauteous." He notices a figure standing next to the door and realizes it's a woman, so he straightens himself and gives a smile. "Someone get me a straw! I got me a cool glass of Faygo." He leans against the door frame, still smiling.<p>

"Oh, you're too much," she replies. By the sound of her voice, it's an older lady. The sun goes down some more and he takes in her beauty; longass salt and pepper curly hair, longass fuchsia dress, and a sweet face and hella basket on her arm. He winks and she saunters close to him. She suddenly grabs his collar roughly and produces a dagger from the basket. "Where does that secret entrance end?"

"Sharp!" He swallows. "Can I get back to you?"

"You're going to tell me. Now!"

"Uh…" He hesitates. "Okay you're gonna go 'bout thataway 'til you get to the other sign, then you turn left and go ten spaces! It's the tree with a duck on it!" It's the long way around, and he's fairly sure they went the short way? He wasn't paying attention to what Vriska told everyone after the guards and that crazy horse left.

"Thank you," the lady says sweetly, putting the dagger back. She walks away, swaying her hips back and forth, her dress accentuating her moves.

"Wow," he mutters. "She scary."


	9. Camping and New Friends

"So exactly how long has your hair been doing that?" Dave asks, trying to hide a high-pitched voice. "I need years, months, days, hours, minutes here." They're sitting on a fallen tree, a fledgeling fire going in the near-darkness.

"Uhhh..." Jade pauses, contemplating. "Seventeen years, eleven months, thirty days, twenty-one hours, and give or take about fourteen minutes?" She looks up and him and shrugs, still not sure she was supposed to share that information. "That's why mother hid me, though! Because my hair is so valuable."

"Because it glows?" he asks incredulously. "That seems like a stretch. Having it glow would be kinda cool and really useful. Doesn't sound like something someone would hide a whole human being for."

Jade laughs nervously. "Yeah, sure!" She stares at the fire they had to make because the sun sat so quickly. It looks like they're roughing it tonight. "I spent my whole life in that tower, you know."

"How did you not get bored?"

"I mostly painted and grew flowers and food sometimes. Mother would get me seeds and I would spend those days watching them grow."

"So you literally watched plants grow?"

"Mm-hm!"

"Wow."

"And after I painted I sometimes watched them dry to see how long I needed before making another layer."

"And she watched paint dry! You are literally the most incredible person I have ever met besides myself." He pointed his injured hand to his chest.

Jade feels her face flush so much she covers her face. "Well, the glowing isn't really all it can do..." She looks at his eyes, then glances at his hand, then back up. "Can I see?"

"Uh, sure," he answers warily, offering his hand. She takes it and wraps it in a portion of her hair. She takes a deep breath and closes her eyes, singing seriously for the first time since she hit puberty.

_Flower gleam and glow  
><em>_Let your power shine_

Her hair starts to glow, edging its way from her scalp to the tips. She can't see it, but she knows it's happening because well, she does have nearly eighteen years of experience.

_Make the clock reverse  
><em>_Bring back what once was mine  
><em>_Heal what has been hurt_

"What the-!" he exclaims.

_Change the fate's design  
><em>_Save what has been lost  
><em>_Bring back what once was mine  
><em>_What once was mine..._

She opens her eyes to Dave's mouth hanging open. He takes a short breath.

"Don't!"

He squeaks, holding back the shriek that he is most likely holding back. She's seen it only once before, when her mother held back the shock of her nails growing back after she nearly broke them off after slipping from the rope ladder once. That was before Jade's hair was long enough to use yet, and they only had a single rope with knots tied in them because Jade wasn't strong enough to hoist a human, let alone wooden planks attached to two thick ropes.

"Now you know."

"I see now why she made the choice to hide you but I mean why would they want someone who can heal with her hair by singing, I mean come on, nobody has an actual _need _for that or anything!" He tried not to let his voice raise to incomprehensible octaves, but it seems he was unable to keep his voice from raising to incomprehensible octaves. Her hair starts to fade and he stares at it up until the tips fade back to its usual black color.

They sit for a few moments and listen to the crickets make music around them. It reminds Jade of home, listening to the outside world with her windows wide open, nothing illuminated except the sky and a single candle in her room. Of course, she only did this while her mother slept or when she was home alone. On her birthday, she would sneak to the biggest window in the tower and watch the glowing clouds float to the sky. One time, she thought one would float down into the crevice where they resided, but it ended up in the trees instead. She remembered she thought it was a falling star and reaching for it, even though it was too far away.

"I'm gonna go get some firewood," Dave says suddenly. Jade looks to their pile and sees they have plenty. By the time she looks back at Dave, he's already halfway to the line of trees.

"Hmm, he's quite a catch," a familiar thin voice says from behind. She whips around at her hips to see her mother standing about ten feet away.

"Mother!" Jade exclaims. Her mother approaches her and she closes the gap, going in for a hug. "How did you find me?" she asks cautiously.

"Oh, I just followed the long, long strands of deceit and betrayal," she says a bit too closely to Jade's ear. As they separate, she strokes Jade's hair.

"That still doesn't-"

"Honey, you're not that good at covering your tracks." She sighs and steps back a little further. "What I really want to know is why you're even with him to begin with! Really, this rebellious stage of yours has to end eventually."

"He's taking me to the glowing clouds." _Because you wouldn't,_ she thought at the same time.

Mother sighs. "I know you're thinking because I don't care about you, but I do! It's why I didn't want to take you, because all the outside world will think about is your hair and how much they want to usurp it." Her words hang in the air. The crickets had stopped sometime after Dave left, And Jade thinks she knows why now. "Come on, let's go home." Her mother reaches for her hand, but Jade pulls away.

"No!" Jade says a little too loudly. Quieter, "Not yet."

"No?" mother responds calmly. "Oh, I see." She crosses her arms and looks down her nose at Jade. "So you think you know more than I do about the world, right?"

"No! It's just that..." Jade pauses, looking down and searching for the words as to how she's feeling at the moment. She doesn't want to go back home yet, and she definitely won't go with anyone except for… "I think he likes me," she mumbles.

"I couldn't tell because you were mumbling, but," Jade looks up to see her mother's eyes practically aflame with anger, "Did you just say he might _like you?_" She scoffs. "Please! Don't be daft! He's obviously only interested because of your hair!" Jade looks down. "He has probably been with hundreds of other women who are much more interesting _without_ magic hair!"

Jade looks up at that, about to protest, but she remembers that he said "incredible," not "interesting," and remains silent.

"Honey, this is why I told you it would be too dangerous! There are people out there, mean people that will use others to get what they want, and them turn them in to the higher powers when they aren't necessary anymore!" She gives a sweet smile. "You think you're so mature, so grown-up, so... clever!" Her expression darkens slightly, not losing the smile. "You know best, don't you?"

"I think so," Jade says, "I trust him."

"Well, if you think he's so trustworthy, then why don't you give him the satchel?"

"How did you-"

Mother produces the satchel from her cloak and holds it out to Jade. "Put him to the test," she whispers, putting the satchel in Jade's hands. "I didn't touch anything inside, I don't even know what's inside." She steps away, fading into the darkness. "But if the time comes where you do give him the satchel, and he leaves you in the dust with a couple of ruffians who know exactly what to do with naive girls like you, don't come crying to me!"

And at that, she disappeared.

* * *

><p>Dave knows it was stupid, but he needed to process. Magic hair that glows <em>and<em> heals? That's the most awesome thing he's ever heard of. He actually gathers sticks, even though they had plenty, and returns to the orange glow. He calls out, "Hey, Jade, do you think my hand will have special abilities now?" He manages to survive the pitch-black ground and exits the trees. "I feel like my palm was dipped in the Styx. I think I can feel it getting stronger already! Could I punch out someone and have them go flying or-" He sees her staring into space, hunched over on the fallen tree and with her head in her hands, not even listening. "-Are you okay?" He places the new bundle of sticks next to the old pile.

"What?" she asks, confused, "Yeah, I'm okay..." she mumbles.

"You sure?" He decides to poke fun. "You look a little unsure of yourself."

"I'm not unsure!" she yells.

Now _he's_ unsure. How. "Okay." He sits down next to her. "Well, we should probably get to sleep, then. We have a big day tomorrow. Huge. Massive." He sneaks a glance. "Birthdays, man. They're kind of a big deal."

Jade stays silent some more.

"So do you use your hair as a sleeping bag or what?"

"Sometimes."

"Can I ask you a weird question?"

"Besides that one?"

"Can I sleep on your hair?"

She breaks out of her trance and stares at him like his hair suddenly turned pink.

"Kidding."

She chuckles and pushes up her glasses. "We should sleep, then," she says, nodding.

Dave stares at the fire for another moment while Jade sets up her hair as a small bed for herself. It's not that he was serious about sleeping on her hair, he was trying to cheer her up. He still doesn't know why, because she seemed fine when he went away after being awkward as hell. He puts the thoughts out of his mind for now. The fire still had a few more minutes until it burned out, so he gets up to put a bit more wood on the fire. On the way, Jade sits up suddenly.

"How'd you become an orphan?"

That took him by surprise. He takes off his sunglasses, trying to think of an excuse, but she did just tell her secret, so why not tell his?

"Sorry, if you don't want to talk about it, that's okay," she mumbles, "you don't have to..." She twists her hair between her fingers. That's cute. Wait, no, stop.

"No, that's fair," he answers, putting his glasses back on. He turns to get rid of the wood, tossing it on the fire, and sits to face her. "Hi, I'm David," he reintroduces himself, sticking out a hand, "also known as Dave Strider, orphan. Nice to meet you." She stares at the hand like it's an apple on a lilypad. "Seriously? This is a handshake."

"Oh!" She takes his hand and shakes it from side to side.

He pulls out his hand. "Okay, okay, we'll work on that." He takes a breath. "I've been by myself for as long as I can remember. Then one day at the orphanage, there was a lady who came to read to us. She mainly read stories about a cool adventurer named Brock Strider. He had a sword and could cut boulders in half if they came at him."

"Boulders?" Jade giggles. "Who would be strong enough to throw boulders at him?"

"Trolls!" He throws his arms in the air. "Big ones!" He takes off his sunglasses and looks into Jade's eyes. "They exist." He leaves them off because only tools wear sunglasses at night. "Anyway, he had enough money to do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted, and he had a collection of swords, one for every adventure. He would let these kids visit him, and he'd tell them a story about where each sword came from. He would wear these sunglasses all the time. They were his trusty pair. He never left on an adventure without them. But on my sixteenth birthday, the lady that read to us told us that there weren't going to be any more after that day. I was pissed. Most of us were. We paid attention, though." He sighs, remembering the queen's face as clear as day. Before she left, she looked like she was really worried about her daughter. "It ended with Brock giving one of the little boys his sunglasses and going off into the sunset." The little boy was blond, so Dave put himself in that kid's shoes. Like he'll ever reveal that _ever_. "But yeah, she told all of us later that she was the one who wrote the stories, so that kind of made up for it just ending."

"Is that where you got your last name?"

"Smart _and_ cute." _NOOO, YOU BLITHERING IDIOT!_ Jade turns bright red. Dave himself flushes with embarrassment. "I'm just pointing out the facts." He clears his throat. "But yeah, I didn't have one before, so I borrowed his."

"I think you chose well."

"Thanks."

They sit for a bit before Dave continues. "I'd been working since that day to save up and leave town, and as soon as I turned nineteen, I took all my savings I had under my mattress and moved out. That's when I met my roommates. They were looking for a third guy and I was looking for a roof, so..." He made his mouth into a hard line. "Then they turned out to be thieves. I didn't ask and they didn't tell. Until they told me to hide something for them. My boss found out, but I begged not to tell. He fired me but said he wouldn't report me to the authorities. Who he _did_ tell was his friends that I was a dirty thief. So a dirty thief I became."

"You look pretty clean to me."

"It's an expression." He shrugs. "I figured out I was good at it, too. So here I am now, four years and ten towns later, and on the run from a crazy horse with a girl with some super secret magic hair."

"Sounds exciting and dangerous."

"Yeah, too bad it's wrong and irredeemable. Technically, I stole you."

"I came willingly!" she huffs, pushing up her glasses. Her chameleon put himself on her shoulder and nodded. "Besides, I don't think it's as bad as killing someone. I think you could be redeemed, Dave. Don't doubt yourself so much."

If she only knew the things he did. Nobody got hurt, but it wasn't exactly petty theft, either. "Yeah, well, we should sleep. Fire's almost out, and we have to hope it doesn't rain tonight."

"Oh, it won't. The rainy season around here doesn't start until late spring. Last year, it started on May third."

"Incredible." He gets up to get more firewood and tosses it in. "Goodnight, Jade."

"Goodnight Dave." He sneaks a glance and see her smiling at him and turns away right after he sees her.

He falls asleep staring at the stars through the canopy.

He wakes up with water dripping on his face. But didn't Jade say it wouldn't rain? He opens his eyes and there above him is the crazy horse, snout dripping with water. Now he just looks angry. At least he didn't have his rider with him. "Well, I hope you're here to apologize."

The horse snorts angrily, pelting him with more water.

"Gross."

The horse takes offense and immediately lunges at Dave's boot, dragging him.

"Hey! Leggo!" he yells, struggling against the nearly-half-ton beast. He looks at Jade, who was just woken up by his screaming.

"Hey, stop!" she shouts, getting up and following the kidnapping of a man by a horse. She catches up quickly and Dave reaches out. She grabs his hands and pulls, succeeding in pulling Dave out of his boot. He gets up and hides behind her. "Easy, easy!" she says gently, waving her arms. It seems to cooperate, but then he notices the chameleon on the top of her head. She probably doesn't notice. "Good horsey!"

The horse neighs at her quizzically.

"Sit."

He huffs.

"_Sit_."

He sits.

"What?!" Dave exclaims. How?!

"Shh!" she hushes, not turning away from the horse. She reaches out and strokes his mane. "There we go, uh..." She looks under the horse. "Boy! Aww, you're such a good boy!" His tail starts to wag. Is this a dog or a horse? It drops the boot and Jade quickly grabs it and hands it to Dave without breaking eye contact. "Does no one appreciate you?" The horse nods. "And was this man being mean to you?" It nods again. "Well, I think today is a good time to start over, uh..." She looks down at a brass emblem attached to the saddle. "Karkat." She turns to Dave, still petting the horse.

"What?"

"Dave, this is Karkat." She turns to the horse. "Karkat, this is Dave." The horse glares like he already knew Dave's name.

"We've met."

"This isn't the crazy horse is it?" The horse named "Karkat" looks at both him and Jade, flabberghasted.

"Yeah."

"He doesn't look crazy!"

"He's an angry horse bent of revenge!"

"No he's not! He's just a big softie on the inside." She turns to Karkat and gives him more neck-rubs and baby-talk. Dave rolls his eyes and sits on the ground to put his boot back on.

* * *

><p>"So, could you please hold off on your rivalry for twenty-four hours?" the girl asks sweetly. Karkat frowns. Like he'd do that just because a cute human asked him to. He's been chasing David Strider for nearly four years, and one simply does not press pause after years of-<p>

The freaky chameleon is staring at him again. The girl doesn't seem to notice that the thing is glowing bright green. Neither does David. It's probably more sentient than Karkat is. Than a human maybe. The chameleon's body language is telling Karkat to hold off. _For now,_ he agrees.

David reaches out to shake hands while the girl stands by expectantly. Both he and Karkat squint at each other. He doesn't deal much with criminals, so this temporary truce is nauseating.

"It's also my birthday..." she mumbles.

"Oh yeah!" David says, expression softening and turning his head to her. "Happy birthday, Jade." Karkat cocks his head to the side. What.

He looks down to see that David's hand still outstretched. Karkat lifts his hoof reluctantly, absolutely disgusted with himself. All this for a girl. He wonders if this criminal is doing it for the same reasons.


	10. Kingdom Dance (bonus grimdorks)

Jade had never seen so many people since the Cuddly Grubling, but this was about a hundred times that! People everywhere, doing things, preparing for some kind of festival-

"Ow!" she cries out. Holding her hair to her scalp, she looks back to see her hair getting stepped on and nearly tripping a poor man holding rolls and rolls of posters. She pushes through the crowd, gathering up her hair, and meets Dave doing the same, trying to mount it onto Karkat, Karkat refusing. Jade intercedes before they start fighting, but she's going to keep an eye on them. She knows it's asking for a lot to keep them from either killing each other or worse, but she needs Dave to take her back home and she can't let Karkat take him away. She takes her hair back.

"I told you that we need to cut this," Dave mutters a bit too loudly.

Jade squints. She forgot to tell him why last night, so she softens her expression and decides now is as good as any. "Well, I can't, because then it'll lose its powers." She was always told that even little trims made it ineffective, so mother always brought home expensive oils from the Far East, or so she said, and slathered them in. It worked. She bent her head down to show him the back of her head, fingering the short tufts that always stuck up no matter what she did to them. "People broke in to try to cut it, and they succeeded once, so mother took me away." She looks back up, smiling. "So keep sharp objects away, got it?" She summoned up her big girl voice, and that worked, too. Dave put his shoulders up in defeat.

"What about styling?" he asks, pointing behind her.

She turns and sees three little girls sitting on a stone fountain, playing with each others' hair. They each have long hair and are dressed the same. They also each have a basket of fresh flowers blossoms, everything from daisies to mini roses to buttercups. Jade practically drooled when she saw the variety.

"I'll take that as a 'yes'?"

Karkat neighs in agreement, helping Dave carry her hair and clopping over to the three girls. She thought she saw them give each other dirty looks, but they looked normal when she peered closer. She waves it off. For now.

* * *

><p>The way he stares at her. It's like she has some dire secret to protect. The Jade human has grown on him. She is innocent. Much like Roxy when she first met Karkat. He remembers being obnoxious to her because it was easy, and then one day she was obnoxious right back and when he tried to retaliate, she threatened him with a whip. In any case, it doesn't feel right being obnoxious to someone he'll never meet again, so he volunteers his efforts as a steed, however temporary, and tosses some of her hair over his saddle gently with his teeth, and trots over to the three girls by the fountain.<p>

It wasn't until he gets closer when he realizes the girls are wearing uniforms. Silly, yellow things that represented the local Good-Deed Girls troop. Their whole premise was annoying at best. The three girls hear Dave call out to them and their faces light up. The one with two long braids nearly tramples her friends to get to Jade's hair. One wearing paper cat ears trips, but lands on her hands and gets right back up, just to trip again when she gets to Jade. The last one wearing a flower crown and glasses with very long and fluffy hair accidentally bumps into the girl with the braids, spilling loose flowers everywhere.

"Aradia, it's so long!" the girl with cat ears exclaims. Karkat rolls his eyes. Really? He didn't notice.

"Okay girls," braids girl orders, clapping her hands, "let's get ta work!" She then proceeds to rub her hands together ominously. "I hope ya like braids!"

"One braid!" cat-ears suggests.

"We should use the flowers," the other one says.

"Pipe down, you two, I'm thinkin'," the first girls says. "Oh yeah, I'm Meenah, cat-ears girl is Meulin, and flower girl over there is Aradia," she says, pointing to herself and the other two.

"It's nice to meet you!" Jade says cheerfully, smiling. She puts her hair down in front of them and they inspect it. Dave does the same.

"Good, great, now let's do this," Dave says. Finally, someone with some sense of time. Karkat glances around, making sure they're not drawing attention to themselves. He sees some guards two vendor stalls down, so he gives Dave a short nudge and gestures in that direction. Dave gets the idea. "Be right back, Jade. I'm going to get us some snacks."

"Okay!" She completely trusts him with this. Karkat shakes his head, sighing.

They move out of sight from the guards just in time. "So you have gold or what?" Dave asks.

Karkat huffs in return. Roxy had a stash in the saddle, but there's no way he's giving that away.

"Fine, I'll just look around."

Karkat hits him in the gut.

"Ow, fu-hmmm!" He groans, trying to find his voice. "For an odd job, you dumb horse! It'll take a while for them to fix her hair up, so why wait! God, what are your shoes made of, steel?!"

As a matter of fact, they are. Karkat shows off one of them to Dave, giving the human his best sneer. Speaking of shoes, he needs to replace them soon, they're getting uncomfortable.

"I did not need to know that." Dave straightens himself up slowly. "Come on, someone has to have something I can do around here. I also need protection, so could you?" He gestures to another entrance to the festival. "Please?" He actually looks like an honest person under those sunglasses.

Karkat rolls his eyes and starts to lead the way, before he turns away completely, he snickers.

"Are you laughing?"

Karkat snickers again. All this for a girl.

* * *

><p>Dave can't believe this. Karkat is mocking him for looking for a job. Well, if he wants a two-bit criminal to redeem himself and look for money the real way, he's going to have to do some odd jobs! Stupid horse. What, did he expect Dave to beg and steal forever? Hah! He usually doesn't let his anger get to him, so time to play it cool.<p>

So far, Karkat seems to be keeping up with his promise. He's hung up decorations, set up tables, and even hammered the sign to the library back in place. For all of the small odd-jobs he found in the past hour, the library was the only one that didn't pay him, but they told him he could come back anytime and get free reading lessons. Dave didn't have the heart to tell them he could already read and write good.

He returns to Jade with nearly a pound of gold in a pouch attached to his belt. Not a bad haul, if he could say so himself. He almost couldn't find her because her hair wasn't everywhere. He searched the area around the fountain with his eyes before going out into the open. Karkat gave the go-ahead and he did manage to find a girl with a very thick braid sitting away from them, her hair adorned with flowers of all kinds. The three mini hairstylists point at him, giving away his position, and she turns.

Dave stops walking. He can't stop his face from turning red, though. Fortunately, she was too busy twirling to notice.

"Didn't they do such a good job?" she asks.

"So many flowers," is all Dave can manage. Karkat hits him again, this time softly enough to just get his attention. The horses waggles his eyebrows and Dave shoves him back.

"Dave, where did you get all that gold?" Jade says, wide-eyed.

"I earned it. Odd jobs and such." He plants his hands on his hips.

Jade puts her hands behind her back. "Dave, are you trying to redeem yourself?" she teases.

"You going to mock me, too?"

"Not at all!" she counters. She's good. "I like people who do good deeds."

dave: try to keep your cool

Dave fails to keep his cool. He grabs her shoulders and leads her in the direction of the library. He pulls out three gold coins and hands them to the girl with the cat ears, Meulin, he believes. "Thanks." He doesn't wait for a reply. Karkat follows closely.

"Dave where are we going?"

"To the library."

"What's a library?"

"It's a place where they lend books."

"What kinds of books?"

"All kinds."

"Like cookbooks?"

"Yep."

"And sewing books?"

"Uh… yeah."

"And plant books?"

These genres all seem familiar. "Jade, how many books do you actually own?"

"Three," she answers shortly. "I used to have a fourth about clouds, but I lost it. How many books do they have at the library?"

"About a thousand times that."

She halts, making Dave bump into her and Karkat nearly into them both. She turns to him, mouth agape and eyes wide again, her massive braid swinging along. "Really?! No way!"

"Yes way," he says, nodding. "They offered me lessons, but I said I'd bring a friend, so..." He turns her around promptly, but she walks ahead on her own.

"Let's go!" She turns left at the adjacent street, almost into a group of drunken guards. Dave pulls her back into the alley, hiding her behind him.

"Turn right," he whispers, not facing her. The guards didn't seem to notice and all stumble away. He turns to see her smiling, like that was the most fun she'd had in years.

"That was a close one!" she says in a hushed tone.

Her naivete makes him chuckle under his breath. "Don't do it again. Look both ways before you cross the street."

Jade just nods affirmatively and enthusiastically. She looks up at the sun and says, "It's noon, so should we eat first?"

Dave's stomach growls in response. "Yeah."

* * *

><p>Jade could hardly decide what to eat first. There was the nice pork vendor who gave her a free sample, there was the chicken lady who also gave out samples, and then there were the two kids selling baked potatoes. Dave went with Karkat to a stall that sold apples and festival decorations, but something caught Jade's eye that made her wander.<p>

The mural in the main square is mosaic, and very beautiful. It shows what looks like a story about a flower and a family. The family had a yellow-haired mother and a dark-haired father, and a baby that had dark hair, but the outline consisted of gold-plated pieces. The mother had purple eyes, the father blue, and the baby green. She stares at the baby, squinting and tilting her head to the side. How can someone have black _and_ gold hair?

"Excuse me," a small voice says from behind. Jade snaps out of her trance and sees a little girl, maybe five, put a flower in front of the family in the mural. "It's for the lost princess." Lost princess? She looks back up and notices that both adults in the mosaic have crowns, also gold, but some pieces are also colored. On the baby's head is also a crown, but silver instead of gold, with green pieces in it. She suddenly realizes that the tiara that Dave stole belonged to the royal family.

"Jade!" Dave calls. She draws her mouth to the side, annoyed. She goes back to him and sees that he's holding a plate of the chicken and some apple slices. She crosses her arms. "What?"

"Did you steal the tiara from the castle?" she asks pointedly.

"Uh..." He swallows whatever food was in his mouth. "How did you guess?"

She gestures behind her with her thumb.

"Oh."

"Did you?"

"Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyes."

Jade smacks her forehead, resting her head in her hand, and groans.

"It's a job."

"Who would want a tiara from another kingdom?!"

"Hey, hey, hey!" He shushes her and whispers, "Other kingdoms."

"Dave!"

"Honestly, I'm probably going to just give it back anyway."

She squints her eyes.

"Come on, just eat," he says, rolling his eyes and offering the plate.

She snatches the plate and stuffs her face. "You'f bedder giffit back." She swallows and breaks off a bit of apple and gives it to Bec, who gobbles it up immediately.

"I will!" Dave insists. He reaches into his pocket. "I also got us some souvenirs." He pulls out some light blue flags with the kingdom's goldenrod insignia on them. The insignia is in the shape of a sun, but also looks like a flower, very similar to the giant one in the mosaic mural.

"Thank you, Dave," she says, taking it carefully. Bec gurgles at it, crawling down her arm towards it slowly. "No, Bec, you have other fabric for your bed at home." She carefully folds it and tucks it into her dress.

"Library?" Dave suggests, turned away from her.

"Library." Time to read a thousand books!

* * *

><p>The king stares into space. The queen notices. They were preparing all day for tonight, bathing, tailoring, et cetera. The lantern was ready, faces were shaved, hair perfectly sculpted…<p>

"John, we'll find her," she says, tenderly holding his face in her hands. John sighs in return. She pats his cheeks gently.

"Rose, it's been-"

"Eighteen years, I know."

"What if she's-"

"Too far away to see?"

No response.

"She saw. We have to believe that. You've been helping them spread all over the kingdom and beyond." John brings his hands between them and flexes his fingers slightly. "There's no way she wouldn't have seen them."

"You think so, Rose?"

Rose smiles. "I know so." She sighs and brings his face up to meet her eyes. "Come on. Thousands of lanterns are in your hands now."

John takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. He offers an arm and she takes it. A coordinator leads them to the balcony that faces town, where their lantern is waiting for them. The cloud-shaped blue tissue paper awaits to be lit and lifted into the air, and carried on the breeze John creates to meet up with the night sky's air currents.

Rose bows her head for a few seconds, feeling something good for the first time in what seemed like forever. Something good is going happen, she knows it. It's not something that she has felt any other year during the festival. She often felt this feeling at the orphanage she used to read at, but since the kids she read to most grew up and left, that good feeling went with them. She had hopes one of them would lead her to her daughter, but the good feeling never panned out.

She opens her eyes, untying the lantern from its mount together with John. They lift it and let it go together. They peer down to see more and more lanterns fill the air above the town and float high above the castle. She looks to John, who nods in return. He cracks his knuckles and generates some momentum before controlling nearly every lantern, sending them out in a spiral formation and let them float on the wind currents only he can see. If their daughter is watching now, she would be impressed.


	11. Waiting for the Past To Catch Up With Us

Night soon falls, and Jade didn't get to read all that she wanted to. She saw all kinds of books, but her favorite had to be the art books. They had all sorts of painting styles in there by different people and different things. The librarian told her she could borrow them, and it's not like Jade could have said no! But she did, and now she's regretting it. They had to leave early because Dave had this crazy idea to rent out a boat and watch the glowing cloud lanterns from the water. They managed to get to the docks just in time to get the last boat, too.

"Do you even know how to row a boat?" Jade asks.

"Of course I do. I stole a pirate ship once," Dave brags. He probably didn't, so she just rolls her eyes. He leads her into the boat, offering his hand for support, and she takes it gladly.

"Thank you, sir knight," she says, curtsying. She takes her seat on one of the horizontal benches built into the boat, then Dave starts rowing.

Karkat neighs from his position on the deck. "Hold your horses, I won't let you starve," Dave replies, reaching down to get the bag of apples he bought. It was Jade's idea to get him food, but Dave's idea to get apples specifically. "I bought them this time." Dave turns back to Jade and starts to row. "Most of them." Jade reaches and hits him upside the head. "Hey!" She shrugs and looks over to the castle nonchalantly. Well, she tries to. She sneaks a glance and sees that he's concentrating on rowing.

After a peaceful moment of rowing and sounds of waves lapping against the boat, Dave stops rowing. "What's the matter?" Jade asks.

"I think we're good." He slides his sunglasses up, revealing his forehead and wiping the slight layer of sweat from it, and points to the castle. "Perfect spot, right?"

Jade turns to the castle as well. "Yeah, it is." She smiles.

"Any minute now, right?"

"I think so."

The awkward silence is filled with the sounds of the water as the sun sets entirely. Dave eventually took off his sunglasses and folded them to his collar. He also took the oars out of the water and gingerly placed them inside the boat.

"Dave, I-"

"Jade-"

"Sorry! You first."

"You sure?" She nods. "Okay, but before I do that, I think they're starting."

She turns to the castle again and sure enough, a single cloud-shaped lantern floats into the sky. But… this lantern is different. Instead of white or yellow, it's light blue. She quickly gets to her feet, nearly tipping the boat, and leans on the bow to get a closer look. She wonders if the king and queen get a different color than the rest of them. The lantern barely reaches the tallest tower of the castle when the buildings in town begin to softly illuminate. The torches were snuffed out for the event, probably so that the people could see the first lantern go up. Sudden blips of light coming from the shore get her attention as well. In a matter of minutes, hundreds of lanterns fill the air.

"Jade." She turns. Dave is holding two clouds, one in each hand, both lit. She smiles widely, taking in a breath and holding it. She lets it out and scrambles back to him, making the boat teeter side-to-side again. She can barely contain her excitement and he holds one out carefully. "There's a handle underneath," he says. She feels for it, grazing his fingers in the process. She stops herself from looking up at him in reaction to it. They linger for a second before he slides away. All of the lanterns seem to slowly converge around the castle, so they face the castle and gently push the lanterns upward. Theirs in particular stay close until they blend in with the rest in the sky.

With all the beauty before her, one thing also occupied her mind. She senses that she is being watched and looks over to Dave, who is giving her a small smile. He looks completely relaxed, completely different than his entire demeanor so far. She's sure the lanterns are doing something, she's just really distracted at the moment. She scoots closer, taking his hand and he taking both of hers in his. Then she remembers. "Wait, I was going to give you something."

"Can't it wait? We're kind of having a moment here."

Jade shakes her head. She's deprived him of the satchel long enough. She lifts her dress slightly, grips the bag, and tugs the strap out from around her hips, where it had been since last night. "I wanted to give your bag back." She clutches it with two hands and is about to hand it to him when he pushes it into her lap with one hand, taking her cheek in the other. Air catches in her throat, suddenly nervous. She thinks she knows what's about to happen, she saw it in one of the art books just today. She asked Dave what they were doing and he explained it was what people did if they really liked each other.

"It could have waited," he mutters. He leans in close and she does the same.

She closes her eyes, heart pounding and trying not to think about the kind of breath she has right now. When their noses touch, she widens her eyes and mumbles, "Sorry!" She hopes she didn't ruin the moment.

"Nah," he says, tilting her head with the hand that was on her cheek. Closing her eyes again, she waits. Then he sighs, cursing under his breath.

"What's wrong?" She pulls away, searching his expression for an explanation.

"I gotta, uhm..." He looks about for the oars and puts them back in place. "I'm sorry, just let me-"

"It's okay." It didn't feel okay, but it did feel fleeting. She felt slightly annoyed, but she didn't want Dave to know she was angry, so she just looked at the castle instead. The town started to light up again, and not a single lantern was to be seen. It was like the ceremony didn't even happen. Had they been there that long? She sighs, but doesn't regret coming here at all. Her dream had come true, she had come to see the clouds. But what now? "So, what do I do now?" she wonders aloud.

The boat starts to move. "What?" Dave asks.

"I fulfilled my dream, so now what?" she clarifies.

Dave doesn't answer until they nearly reach the other shore. "Get a new dream, I guess."

Jade scoffs lightly. "Easier said than done, but I think I know where to start." He stops rowing for a moment and their eyes meet. They smile at each other.

"_Dreams_," he says like he was correcting her. Or was he correcting himself? She wasn't sure, so she knits her eyebrows together. "I'll tell you in a sec." The boat hits some rocks, so Dave runs along the banister and onto shore, avoiding the water like it was his job. He pulls it up and ties it to a nearby tree stump. "Be right back. I won't be long."

"Okay, I trust you." Dave opens his mouth to say something, but clamps his jaw shut and nods, disappearing into the thickening mist. She turns back towards the stern and notices that the built-in bench where she was sitting was empty. The satchel was gone. She whirls around in his direction, but he was still gone.

She gets out of the boat.

* * *

><p>"Okay, guys, I know you're there," Dave calls out. He interrupted his moment with Jade for these clowns. Unbelievable. The two of them come out of the woodwork like a couple of creeps. "Let's get this over with."<p>

"Look who has other priorities," Dirk says, picking at his gloves with a dagger.

"It's like he forgot about us!" adds Jake, holding the bright green-colored lantern at his side.

"Yeah, actually," Dave retorts. He pulls out the satchel and tosses it between them. "Y'all can have the tiara. I've seen bigger fish."

"Like the girl?" Jake asks.

Dave hesitates for half a second, which anyone who knows him at all would notice and immediately tell he was lying. "What girl?"

"The girl with the magic hair," Dirk says, meeting Dave's gaze. Dirk's shades also hung over the front of his collar, so Dave moved his own to his belt.

"Girls like that exist? Then what are we-" Jake interrupts Dave's denial speech with a hard blow to the gut.

"Don't play us for fools!" Jake sneers, taking the back of Dave's collar. It wasn't hard, since the height difference was at least a full head. Jake stopped growing at nearly six-and-a-half feet tall and had too many chest hairs for Dave's taste. He wasn't jealous or anything, but it's the first place he reaches for to defend himself. Jake cries out, but doesn't drop Dave. Instead, he's thrown down, his face drilled into the ground. Dave's yelling is muffled by damp earth.

"Knock him out already!" Dirk urges. Dave is not having this. Hell no. Hell fu-

"Dave!" a girl's voice calls out. No. "Dave, where are you?" Why the hell did Jade get out of the boat?!

Dave uses his arms to force his head of the ground just enough to get his voice out. "Ja-!" Jake shoves it back down, at least breaking Dave's nose, then sits on his back. He's powerless. He's angry. He can't breathe.

"I'll take care of this," Dirk mutters.

"Flatten your hair," Jake whispers. Dave flails his fists and manages to get Jake's arm, but he knows the angle is enough out of his reach to weaken the blows significantly. No, no, no! "You remember what the old lady told you to say?" Wait, old lady? Were they talking about Jade's mother?

"Of course I remember. You're the forgetful one."

"Cheerio, mate," Jake snickers.

And just like that, he's out like a light.

* * *

><p>"Dave, come on!" Jade huffs. Bec crawls out to her shoulder. She picks him up and tells him, "Worst game of hide and seek ever." She puts him back when she sees a figure in the green-lit mist. "Dave, don't freak me out like that!" She walks towards him. "We're not playing hide and seek!" Something's not quite right. She adjusts her glasses. The sunglasses attached to the front of his shirt were all wrong. She looks up to see a stranger. He looks similar to Dave, blond and freckled, maybe even more handsome…<p>

"Olly-olly oxen free," the man says smugly.

"Where's Dave?" she demands, frowning and clenching her fists. Bec crawls back into her hair.

"Oh boy," he says, reaching behind his head to ruffle his hair, which immediately spiked up. "I hate to be the one to tell you this, but," he gestures to the water, at a small sailboat heading back to the other shore, back to town, "he's gone." The figure standing at the helm had an unmistakable red vest and fluffy blond hair.

"No way," she mumbles, shaking her head. "Dave! Dave, get back here! You told me you were going to give it back! Dave! _Dave!_"

"It looks like he left you in the dust with a couple of ruffians who know exactly what to do with naive girls like you." She looks up at the man in horror. Another man emerges from the fog holding a sack. She feels the blood drain from her face. Mother was right.

"No," Jade whispers, her breath quickening. She turns to run. She had come pretty far, and she has a slight advantage with her hair not quite so long. She wishes she hadn't left her frying pan in Karkat's saddle. The boat maybe? She turns the corner and sees that it had been untouched. She'll never untie the knot in time. It's too far to swim to the other side, and her hair will probably drag her down anyway- "Ah!" she yelps. Her braid snagged a fallen tree and nearly made her fall. She turns to free her hair and sees one of the ruffians turning the corner, the one holding the sack.

_Whack! _Then a yell. The ruffian stops in his tracks and turns behind him. "Dirk?" he calls out. "Dirk, what happened?" He runs back where he came. Another whack, then a thump.

Jade tends to her braid. She frees it and hears footsteps. She scurries behind the boat as soon as she sees the green lantern, bringing her knees to her chin. She holds her breath, plugging her nose and mouth. If those two ruffians know about her hair, who else could come out of the shadows and chase her down? Mother was right all along! She's a terrible daughter. She's naive and she should have listened! She can't go home, since her mother said not to come crying, she can't hope to row the boat safely back to the other side, and Karkat is too far away to hear-

"Jade!" a strained, but familiar voice calls out. Jade holds back a gasp. "Jade, it's safe to come out now! I took care of those ruffians!"

She gets to her knees and turns to put both hands on the side of the boat to pull herself up. "Mother!" she cries. Her mother lifts her skirt and rushes to Jade, dropping the lantern when they embrace. "I'm sorry!" she cries again, tears forming.

"Shh, it's okay, I'm here," her mother coos, stroking the back of Jade's head soothingly. "They can't hurt you now."

"I'm so sorry, I should have listened to you!" She dries her tears on her mother's cloak, which she then removes and wraps it around Jade. "Can we go home?" she sniffles.

"Of course we can, sugar," her mother says. "All is forgiven." She holds Jade away slightly. "But we can't leave yet." Mother glances around and stops at the boat. "Just stay back, I'll tie them up so we can report them to some guards, okay?" She kicks one of them in the ribs. Hard. She never knew her mother was this strong. But it makes sense because she had to survive in the real world. Jade sees that now.

After both ruffians are tied up, she leads Jade away. Jade looks back at the general direction that Dave went to, but the boat was long gone. She sniffles again. She wants to feel angry, but she doesn't. She's sad. He betrayed her. She wants to hit him, but at the same time, she never wants to see him ever again. That annoying feeling in her gut says that there's something fishy about this, but she's too emotional to even listen to it.

Mother inspects her handiwork and approaches Jade. "Let's go home."

"Yes, mother."

* * *

><p>Dave's head hurts. Heck, his <em>nose<em> hurts.. He remembers being with Jade, tossing the tiara, then being hijacked-

"Jade!" He can't move. He looks at his arms, which are bound to a wheel for a boat. His torso and legs are also tied to a stake. He struggles, but the knots don't move. He quietly lets out a slew of curses. How the hell is he supposed to get out of here? He looks ahead and sees that he's not too far away from the boat rental dock, but heading straight for a group of soldiers standing guard. If he had any luck at all, broken sword would still be in the satchel and he could free himself before he brought any unwanted attention to himself. How long was he out, anyway? He has to get back to the tower to warn Jade about how dastardly her mother actually is.

"Over there, that's the tiara!" a guard calls. He looks up to see him pointing, the tiara tied to the wheel, and the sun rising behind the castle. Panicking, he tries to wiggle out, or find a friend, or even-

"Karkat! If you can hear me, go find Jade! She's in danger! Forget our rivalry, just go find her! Karkat, do something! KARKAAAT!" By that time, the boat reaches port, bumps the dock, and soldiers swarm him, cutting him loose and carrying him off. Then by some miracle, he sees Karkat's dried-blood-colored coat through the crowd. He takes a deep breath.

* * *

><p>Karkat woke up the same time he did every morning, just before the sun. The sun was rising and those two human lovebirds didn't wake him up, which is rude, or they hadn't returned yet. Either way, they're going to face his wrath when he sees them again. He looks over to the pile of apple cores he finished last night. He figured Dave was lying about stealing some of them about an hour after those two left. The twenty-four hours were almost up and he still had to bring Dave in once and for all. He scans the water for any sign of them and sees a sailboat approaching a pier about a hundred feet away. It's not the rowboat rental, so he ignores it. Then, the yelling starts.<p>

"The tiara!" a guard reports to another guard right behind Karkat. What. He follows the commotion to the exact sailboat that was coming in. "And Dave Strider!" _What. _He looks at the boat from a safe distance and sure enough, Dave is tied to the helm. Serves him right, but where is Jade? Did she turn him in? If she did, good for her. He was no good for her anyway. She should be able to claim a handsome reward.

"Karkat!" Dave starts yelling. "If you can hear me, go find Jade! She's in danger! Forget our rivalry, just go find her! Do _something!_ _KARKAAAT!_" The guards release him from the ropes and drag him out of the boat. Preposterous. Dave locks eyes on Karkat. "DAMN IT, KARKAT, YOU BULGEREEK NOOKSTAIN! HER OWN MOTHER KIDNAPPED HER! IF YOU LET HER GO, SHE'LL NEVER BE FREE AGAIN!"

The guards notice him standing there and one of them starts to talk to Karkat. He wasn't listening. He was formulating a plan. If Dave was telling the truth that Jade was kidnapped by her own mother, then she deserves to be free. Unfortunately, Karkat has no idea where to even look for Jade. Only Dave knows that. The more he thinks about it, the less he likes the fact that he has to break Dave out of jail. All executions are done at sundown, so Karkat has precious hours to come up with a way to do that. He doesn't want to do anything that might betray Roxy, but he has no time to get a pardon. She will believe the law over anything. He snorts and pushes through the pair of guards, knocking at least one of them into the water.

It takes him an hour to get there, but he manages to gallop all the way to the only thugs who have been in and out of those prisons like they had swinging doors. He barges into the Cuddly Grubling, marches right up to their leader, Vriska Serket aka "Mindfang Spinneret II," and gets right into her face while she mixes drinks. She doesn't even flinch.

"And to what do I owe the pleasure of the captain of the guard's loyal steed?" she snides. He can't give her a piece of his mind, so he glares at her for a moment before searching for something to communicate with. He finds a wanted poster and rips it off the wall with his teeth, placing it on the bar between them. He puts his hoof on Dave's comical likeness. She raises her eyebrows. "What about him?" He draws an "X" over his face. "He's caught? Oh, bummer."

"Uh, I think he wants to break Strider out of jail," the one called Tavros says. How in the hell did he figure that out?

"Really?" She draws out the first syllable. "How about that? Has he brainwashed you into liking him, too? Like he did that girl Jade?" She laughs. "Shades will make any girl fawn."

"Maybe it's about Jade?" Tavros guesses.

Karkat huffs in agreement.

"Tavros, just because you like Jade, doesn't mean that she'll like you back," Vriska says.

Karkat has had enough. He slams his hoof that was still on the bar and makes a deep, horseshoe-shaped dent in it.

"What the hell!" Vriska yells, slamming her hands on the bar and getting in Karkat's face this time. "Tavros. Interpret. Now."

Karkat's not even going to question what is happening here.

"I think he's saying that uh, he wants to break Dave out?" Tavros asks.

"I get that much, but _why?_" Vriska squints, like she's actually trying to understand the situation.

"Uh, hang on." He scans Karkat's bag and goes toward it. Karkat shifts away. "I won't steal your gold, I just need to see something." He reluctantly lets Tavros open the bag and he pulls out Jade's weapon of choice, scratched and dented from use. "It's Jade's frying pan." He He turns to Karkat and smiles like he just won a game against Vriska. "Jade's in danger, and only Dave knows where she is."

"You know this for sure?"

"Uh, duh."

"What are we waiting for, then?" Vriska smiles, amused. "All this for a girl."


	12. Return, Realization, and Tears

Dave paces back and forth in his cell. The trial didn't go well, to say the very least. The captain of the guard was there and read the entire list of his wrongdoings to everyone in that courtroom, with disturbing accuracy. He's surprised she didn't add kidnapping her horse, just for good measure. Anyone with eyes at yesterday's festival saw him and Karkat together doing all those odd jobs. Other than that, everything else from the first time he conspired with Dirk and Jake to assault against the captain of the guard with a frying pan was there. It took an hour just to read all that he did. He didn't even get the chance to defend himself: the bruises on Captain Lalonde's head were evidence enough.

He was sentenced to hang at sundown today.

Just before the last of the sunlight coming from his barred window disappeared from the opposite wall, he heard thrashing and yelling, the accent hitting a very familiar note, combined with someone else's voice, creating a disdainful chord in his brain. Sure enough, the two making such a horrible cacophony in the halls were his shitty roommates. Dave glares at them as they pass by his cell, hoping they could see, but they didn't even acknowledge him. The guard slams the gate just next-door, shouting at the other two to keep quiet, then stops in front of Dave's cell.

"Get up, you," he barks angrily. "Your time has come."

"Oh thank God, I was hoping to have at least one person here understand that I need to get out of here."

"You know what I mean, dumbshit." He motions for Dave to come, jingling handcuffs with his other hand.

"Ooh, bracelets, how ever did you know I liked blackened steel? You shouldn't have." He complies and turns his back to the guard and lets him put the shackles on. He tightens them around Dave's wrists roughly. "Ow! You really shouldn't have!" The guard just chuckles and unlocks the cage. As soon as he lifts the latch, Dave pushes the door as hard as he can, making the guard fly backward. Dave jumps straight into the air so his shackled hands were in front of him, which was really painful because that dumb guard made the wrists so tight, and rushes to the cell with his ex-roommates, grabbing the first one he saw.

"Dave?!" Jake squeaks. Dave guesses that even burly men have their times of squeamishness.

"Where is she?!" he yells.

"She who?"

"Jade, you oversized wallaby!"

"The girl with the long hair, right?"

"Gee, you think?"

"Her mum planned it all! We were going to get the tiara after we sent you off, but she knocked us out for real instead of pretend, now she's going to take the girl to another kingdom now that you're out of the way! Please let go!"

Dave lets go. Not because he wanted to, but because the guard had gotten reinforcements and forcibly pulled Dave off the bars.

"You ain't gonna try that again, that's for sure," the guard hisses.

Dave struggles as he is dragged out of the main jail all the way to the halls just outside the palace courtyard. The small windows told him as much. On the other side, the windows lead to the gallows. He stops struggling, and resorts to walking instead. One of the guards pushes him from behind, telling him to hurry up. If he dies now, and if Karkat failed, Jade's never going to leave her tower again. Her mother will make sure of that. Now that he's looking back on it, he wasn't sure if he could have done anything to prevent her from going back after her birthday anyway. It's just that… Dave could have visited her when her mother wasn't there, he had no problem with living in the forest if he had to. He could have had a good life with her in it. Even if he couldn't absolve his old sins, he could take her away someday and have a new life. With her. His old dreams of living on his own island meant nothing now. And yet, here he was, being dragged to his fate.

Something small catches his eye. He could have sworn it was a small, white ceramic horse, but…

All of a sudden, the door in front of them slams shut. Then the door behind them. The guards whip around to see, but Dave looks ahead of him. The guard that unlocked Dave from his cell storms right up to the door ahead and bangs on it.

"What's the big idea?!" he shouts.

The peephole opens up. "What's the password?" the woman in red glasses asks, then promptly slamming the tiny door shut. Was that Terezi? He's never been so happy to see a blind criminal in his life.

"Open up!"

The tiny door opens again. "What? Not even close!" The door slams shut again.

The door behind creaks open slowly, and Dave notices. He turns to see the largest one, Equius probably, grabbing the other two guards by their necks with his massive arms, choking them in a one-armed sleeper hold and muttering apologies as he drags them back to an awaiting accomplice, whoever it is then closes the door again.

The first guard then bellows, "IF YOU DON'T OPEN THIS DOOR, I'LL-"

"You'll what? Arrest me? You and what army? For all you know, I might have dragons with me."

"Guards! Get her!" He turns to see just Dave standing there. Dave shrugs, then plasters himself against the wall, letting a feral cat girl run past and claws at the guard's face. Dave winces, knowing that's gotta hurt. Eventually, the guard takes off running right at Dave, and Nepeta leaps up and pushes him right into the other wall, knocking him out cold.

"Nice," whispers.

"No time!" the girl informs him, pushing at his back. Terezi opens the door from her end, revealing herself dressed in the brightest outfit of red and teal, and Vriska holding a set of keys.

"Something tells me you all have done this before."

"Done what?" Vriska asks innocently, unlocking Dave's cuffs. He rubs them, soothing the pain they cause in the last five minutes or so.

"Breaking out of prison? I mean, it looked kind of staged."

"We've never done it for a _girl_ before." Vriska looks up into Dave's eyes knowingly. "Just for ourselves."

"What girl?" Dave wasn't sure if he should trust them, especially because he now knows about Jade's magic hair.

"Deny it again and you're going back to the gallows."

Dave shuts up.

"Onward!" Terezi shouts, pointing her stick to the wall.

"Terezi, I know I told you this is your day, but that's a wall," Vriska snides.

"It must be this other wall that's a secret passage, then. I felt the breeze."

"As a matter of fact, it is the other wall. Now let's get to the courtyard, the others are waiting!" She drags Terezi while Nepeta pushes Dave right through the secret passage to the courtyard, where all the other criminals in their little organization were waiting.

* * *

><p>Jade sits on her bed, deep in thought and clutching the blue and gold flag in her hands, making sure her mother doesn't see it. Her mother was talking about something, probably how evil Dave was or about thugs and ruffians, but Jade wasn't paying attention. The feeling of her hair being picked through was theraputic, though. Her mother had been diligently removing the flowers and unbraiding her hair all day, probably making sure Jade didn't miss any herself. She sighed every few minutes, not responding to any questions at all.<p>

"There," her mother says, shaking Jade's shoulder lightly. Snapping out of it, Jade looks at her mother's hand, which lingered for a moment after she turned her head to look. "It's like it never even happened." Mother stands up and walks to the door. "I'm making your favorite."

"I'm not hungry."

"I'll warm up some goat's milk, then." She taps her nails on the doorframe and leaves.

Jade sighs again and falls backward to her bed. She unfurls the flag and put it over her eyes, hoping that somehow it will absorb everything she's seen over the past two days so she could forget about it. But things aren't that simple. Her glasses are blocking her eyes from touching the fabric. She removes the flag and takes off her glasses, the world becoming blurry. She starts to put the flag back on when she sees something weird. Over the years, she painted the ceiling above her bed with every little idea that came across her mind. She didn't know why she was drawing them, but they were all starting to look the same.

One time, she painted some fairies in a spiral because she had a dream about flying with them. Another time, her mother brought home some strange star-shaped leaves, which she added to the fairies. Around the same time, she started learning about stars and added them to the fairy wings. Other little things filled the spiral shape, then they morphed into what looked like rays coming out from the spiral, which were made up of various things, basically everything from ants to clouds. When she ran out of room on the walls, she painted the rest of the ceiling around it, but somehow, all of the drawings around the spiral and the rays were light blue.

She compares the ceiling to the flag, holding it close to her face so she could see it better, and gets a sudden headache. She closes her eyes, but the headache only gets worse.

She blacks out.

She wakes up, blurry-eyed, to a golden room, and unable to speak. When she does, it's incoherent babbling. She looks around to see sun and flower symbols floating above her bed, twinkling in the light from a sunset, or what she thinks is a sunset. Two shadows come above her bed suddenly, one dark-haired and one light-haired. They seem like giants to her. The light-haired one reaches down and picks her up, and she clutches onto the purple cloth tightly. The dark-haired one leans close to her face and comes into focus, smiling widely. He's wearing a crown on his head, and saying "beautiful baby girl" over and over.

Jade suddenly opens her eyes, gasping. It was a dream. She flails for her glasses and shoves them on. She now remembers everything. The imposter warming up milk is not her mother. The queen is her mother. Now everything makes sense. The mural was about _her_. Black hair, but also gold, because it was _glowing_.

She stumbles to the door, flag in hand, and leans against the frame just as the imposter arrives to it.

"Jade! You startled me," the Condesce says. "Are you feeling alright?" Jade notices that the woman wasn't looking at Jade when she said that, but her hair.

"I'm not your daughter, am I?"

The Condesce balks at her. "Of course you are! Whatever gave you that idea?"

Jade thrusts the flag in her "mother's" face. "I'm the lost princess!"

"Don't be ridiculous. Drink your milk."

Jade swats the glass out of the Condesce's hand. The cup shatters and an oozing green pill sticks to the bottom of it. It was Jade's turn to balk.

"You were going to poison me!"

"Now you're being completely ridiculous! Why would your own mother kill you?"

"Because you're not my mother!"

"It's not poison, it's sleeping medicine."

"You were going to put me to sleep?!" Jade shrieks. She needs to escape. "Then you'll kill me!"

"I would never! I love you! You've had a long journey and you must be extremely tired. I'm just trying to help."

"You love my hair!" She takes a clump of it and protects it from the crazy woman in front of her.

"I love that, too."

Jade pauses, heart pounding uncontrollably with this new information. "You kidnapped me."

"I protected you."

"From what? A life of luxury?"

"From thieves that wanted to take you away from me."

"_You're _the thief! _You're_ the one who took me away!"

"They stole you first!" the Condesce explodes. Jade cowers slightly, waiting for an explanation. "Before you were born, I found this magical flower. I took care of it for hundreds of years, singing to it, feeding it, and sheltering it from storms. In return, the singing gave me my youth. We were happy." Her mother notices Jade cowering and saunters a little closer. "Until one day, the king stole my flower, all to save his pregnant wife and child." She looks Jade dead in the eye. "People can have more children, but this flower was one of a kind, you see."

"That's no excuse!"

"I'm not done!" She takes a breath and leans away, looking down her nose at Jade, and crosses her arms. "Months later, you were born. They figured out that your hair glowed when you were sung to, but they had no idea how to use its power. They thought you were a miracle! But in truth, they had stolen mine. So in order to protect you, because the king and queen would have figured out its true potential sooner or later and then I would never be young again, I just took you back, because you, and that flower inside you, are mine. You always will be."

Jade covers her mouth. "That's why," she mumbles.

"Mumbling."

"That's why you lied to me all these years! Because you wanted to be young forever!" Jade turns and gathers up her hair. "Well, guess what! I'm not subjecting myself to you anymore! I'm taking my hair and I'm going home! My _real_ home!"

She didn't hear the footsteps gain on her. She feels her hair getting yanked and pulled back. Jade cries out and almost loses her balance. "Guess again, sweetheart," the Condesce says through gritted teeth. "You're not going anywhere."

* * *

><p>"Run that by me again?" Dave asks.<p>

"No time for the long explanation," Vriska says. "Crouch." He does. "Elbows in." He does. "Legs apart."

"See, that's the part that I didn't really under-" Just then, he hears a wood cracking and he's being thrown into the air. "-STAAAAAND!" He stays in the posture that Vriska told him to make as he flies through the air, his sunglasses almost falling off. He lands on something, somehow not dead and his heinie suffering a great deal. He opens his eyes to a red horse. No way.

Karkat had done it. He snorts in Dave's face.

"Thanks," he mutters. Karkat gives Dave a dirty look. "No, for saving me. Thank you. Seriously." Maybe all this time they could have been friends instead of bitter enemies.

Karkat rolls his eyes and looks forward.

"Yeah, you're right, we should skedaddle."

Karkat doesn't move.

"Right, you don't know where to go, got it." He looks up and tries to remember where exactly he went when he was being chased by the entire guard of the palace about ten chapters ago. He sees the same exact bridge that Dave had run across to escape with the tiara. "That way!"

Karkat seems to understand, and takes off.

"We're coming, Jade!" Dave says aloud.

* * *

><p>Did he actually say that out loud? Karkat wonders.<p>

He did his job. He got a bunch of ruffians to agree on something, and he doesn't even care if it's just for a girl. She's not just any girl, she's a sweet girl who didn't do anything wrong, and deserves freedom just like everybody else.

Karkat recognizes some of the paths that Dave leads him down. This is pretty much the same way that he chased Dave down about ten chapters ago. Two hours into their journey, they come to a cave covered by a curtain of vines. Seriously?

"Right through here, Karkat," Dave says quietly.

Karkat should have known he hid in there last time. They enter warily, because it's now dark and hard to see.

"Sorry, Karkat, I have to get there as soon as possible!" Dave says, launching himself from the saddle. He rummages through it and pulls out the satchel, which Karkat salvaged from Roxy's office beforehand, and pulls out two small blades, one broken, one not. Assuming that this mother of Jade's doesn't know how to use a normal weapon, like a sword, Dave should be fine with just those. He runs ahead of Karkat, knowing exactly where to go. You're welcome, Strider, he harrumphs mentally.

When Karkat finally gets to the end of the cave, Dave is already scaling the tower. Looking up at the sheer height of it, Karkat is grateful for being a horse for once.

* * *

><p>Dave only gets ten feet off the ground when Jade's hair comes pouring out of the window. She must be okay! He puts both weapons into his boots before grabbing onto the hair and hauls himself up to the window.<p>

"Jade!" He calls as soon as he enters, hoping for an immediate embrace or some kind of reunion. It's dark. Too dark. He gathers up the rope of hair and pulls the rest of it through the window.

"Mm!"

Dave turns to where he thought the sound was coming from, but sees nothing. He steps closer. "Jade?"

"Try again, loverboy," a thin voice says from behind. Before he could even turn, he feels a sharp pain right in his kidneys.

"Ahh, fff!" he cries out. At first, the pain is not as bad as breaking a bone, but it gets significantly worse when the woman removes whatever blade she used to stab him. He drops to his knees and holds onto the wound, now bleeding profusely through his fingers.

"Mm, mmmm!" The sounds again. That really was Jade then? His eyes focus on the darkness and he sees her bound and gagged, fighting against the ropes with tears in her eyes.

"Are you okay?" he manages to say.

"You, shut up," the mother orders.

"Pfft," Dave chuckles. "I'll shut up when I goshdarned well please."

"Good thing you're dying then," she sneers. "Come, Jade, the loose ends are tied." She reaches down to grab the excess rope that tied Jade up like a common animal. She resists with all of her might, planting her bare feet down and skidding across the cobblestone floor. Dave wants to cheer her on, but his body tells him that he'll die if he moves an inch.

* * *

><p>"No!" Jade finally screams, resisting with all her might. She shook off the gag as soon as her fake mother started dragging her. "Let me heal his wounds!"<p>

The Condesce looks at Jade like she just ate a roach. "Why on earth would I let you do that?"

"Because I will fight you for the rest of my days if you don't!" Jade answers tearfully. The fact that he's here proves that he has a good heart after all. "No singing, no youth!" She glances at him, still groaning. As far as Jade knows, she can only help those that haven't died yet. Bec was on the edge when she rescued him, and she hadn't tried using her hair on anything dead, because logic states otherwise. "But if you let him live, I will be yours forever."

"What?!" Dave yells, then groans again. "That's not what I came for. Don't sacrifice your freedom for me. I don't deserve to even be sitting here right now. You need to be free!" Her heart hurts at his kind words.

She looks back at the Condesce and she rolls her eyes at them. "Fine." She drops Jade's rope and takes a thick chain from one of the cabinets, the one they use to keep the roof intact for bad storms, and wraps his leg, locking it with the padlock. "Just in case he gets any ideas." She then releases Jade.

"Dave!" She runs to him and drops to her knees on the side where his wound is. She peels his hand away slowly, replacing his hand with her own and some hair. "I'm so sorry, Dave."

He shushes her. "No, don't be, I'll be okay." He lifts his hand and waves to come closer. "Can I get a hug?" he rasps.

"Sure, Dave," she replies. He probably figured that the Condesce wouldn't allow time for a hug after he was healed, so she allowed it. As he wrapped his hands around her waist, she kept the hand with her hair on his wound, and begins to sing.

_Flower, gleam and glow,_

Her hair begins to glow.

_Let your power shine,_

She tears herself away from Dave.

_Make the clock reverse-_

_SHHKK!_

"No," the Condesce mumbles.

Jade's hair starts to fade much quicker than it ever had before. That could only mean one thing. She looks behind her at the hair leading right to the Lady Condesce, who's frantically trying to collect it as the glowing fades. "Dave, you-!"

"No, not my youth! Come back!" The Condesce looks right at Jade, wrinkled and even more wiry and decrepit than ever, and launches herself at the pair. Jade cowers over Dave, protecting him as best as she could, but nothing happens. She opens her eyes and all that remains of the woman who raised her is a fuchsia dress on the ground.

Jade looks back at Dave, who's pale and actually managed to take off his stupid shades. He's still bleeding heavily and taking shallow breaths. "Uhm, okay," she mutters, taking her waist-length hair and pressing it to the wound again.

_Make the clock reverse,_

_Bring back what once was mine!_

"Why isn't it working!" she sobs. If her hair can't heal him, he'll die! "Come on, hair!"

"You're free now," Dave says.

"But what about your dream to have your own island and that other dream you almost told me about?" She pleads, but it doesn't change the fact that Dave is dying in her arms.

Dave shakes his head and reaches out to her head, bringing her close. He whispers, "My new dream is for your freedom, and hey look, it came true!" He smiles at her, and she tries to smile back, but her quivering lip makes it hard to do that.

_Heal what has been hurt,_

He lets his arm fall.

_Change the fates' design,_

Tears cloud her vision.

_Save what has been lost,_

She lets them fall as she kisses his cheek, lingering for a moment.

_Bring back what once was mine..._

She kisses his lips lightly.

"What once was mine," she whispers.

She leans back, sitting on her ankles. Bec crawls up on Dave's shoulder and sticks his tongue in, but nothing happens. Bec gurgles unhappily and starts crawling to Jade. Both of Dave's arms are limp and lying in the ground. It doesn't look right, so she leans forward to lift his hands to cross over his chest.

She lifts one arm, then she lifts the arm that was on his wounded side and sees that the blood was completely gone. She blinks, sure that he was bleeding a lot right there, but the wound was still there. Then right in front of her eyes, she sees the wound glow and heal itself, like stitches. Her jaw drops. The rest of him seems to glow, too, hopefully bringing him back to life instead of just healing him. He also deserved to be free, despite everything he has done. As a princess, she can pardon him, right?

"Why do I feel like crap?" Dave mumbles. "Why am I glowing?"

"Dave, you're alive!" Jade exclaims, pouncing on him and hugging him tight. "Don't you ever do that again!"

"I just died for you, and now you yell at me?" He hugs her back.

"Shut up, Dave," she mutters, her voice muffled in his shoulder.

"I'm sorry about your hair," he says apologetically.

"I was going to get it trimmed anyway," she laughs. She sits up. "I like it better this short anyway," she says, feeling the ends.

"Hey, this is still pretty long, according to the normal world," he points out.

"Now the question is, do _you_ like it this way?"

"Uh..."

"Don't answer that." At that, she tackles him again and kisses him right on the mouth. He wraps his arms around her again and holds her close. She loves this. She loves him. She may or may not have said that last part out loud.

"How about we get this chain off me?"

"Good idea." She looks back at the fuchsia dress and finds the key, then unlocks the padlock. The chains drop to the ground heavily, cracking the floor. She doesn't care. She's never coming back to this tower again. Well, maybe to see her paintings, but that's it. She helps him to his feet and they hug again. "Dave, I have something to tell you."

"You're just full of surprises, Lady Jade," he says, separating himself this time.

She takes a deep breath. "I'm the lost princess."


	13. Just a Bunch of Celebrations

"You're what now?" Dave says, balking at her. This shocking development is seriously insane. From what little time he's spent in the capital of the kingdom, he's only seen the mural that one time, and now that he's a lot closer to Jade, he can see the uncanny resemblance.

"My mother-I mean Lady Condesce didn't deny it when I confronted her about it," Jade mumbles, "but it doesn't explain this weird flashback I had today just looking at my own paintings!"

"Uh..."

"I know it sounds crazy, but I'll tell you later."

"How about now? I actually want to see your art. It actually sounds wicked awesome."

Jade just looks at him like he just offended Bec. "Why would it be wicked?"

"No, 'wicked' means 'really cool'," Dave puts up his hands in a half-assed attempt to be apologetic.

Jade just scrunches her eyebrows and turns, her shortened hair swinging with her. "Maybe I won't, then."

Crap, he screwed up! "Sorry, I-"

She turns to him, interrupting with a smile. "Kidding!" she exclaims, sticking out her tongue a little.

Dave scoffs lightly, shaking his head. "Got me there, Jade." He takes her hand and leads her up the stairs. "Let's see these sweet paintings of yours."

* * *

><p>Karkat paces around the tower nervously. It's getting late and they should have been out by now. They must be doing something inappropriate up there. It's been almost an hour, but that's plenty of time to-<p>

A rope comes pouring out of the window, and two people come down, a boy and a girl. Karkat assumes they are Jade and Dave, but he can't be sure because the girl had waist-length hair. The clothes were the same, but he now knows not to draw conclusions without fully investigating it beforehand. Dave lands first, nary a stumble in sight. Then she lands, stumbling at first, and then Dave reaches out to steady her. They both laugh. Karkat frowns, then whinnies to get their attention.

The girl sees him and smiles, waving her arm vigorously and running towards him. "Karkat!" she calls out as she runs. Yep, it's definitely Jade, her happy gait and excited tone gives it away and she hugs around his neck. "Are you and Dave friends now?" she asks, petting his mane.

Karkat snorts in response. More or less, he wants to say. There's going to be hell to pay if they get caught, though. Karkat would probably be put down and Dave arrested again, maybe Jade, too. Everything in his life has changed thanks to this girl.

"We need to go back to the kingdom," Dave says.

What?! Does he even know the consequences of assisting a jailbreak? Does he know how stupid it is to go back?! Karkat huffs in protest.

"I know how stupid it sounds, but hear me out."

Jade cuts in. "I'm the lost princess!"

Karkat sputters. Well, that changes things. He glares at Dave, wondering how they're going to get into the castle, let alone prove it to the king and queen.

"I have a plan," Dave says.

Joy.

* * *

><p>It is almost midnight when the king and queen are awoken by their captain of the guard, Roxy Lalonde.<p>

"Sister, you need to wake up," she says in a hushed tone.

"Rox?" John grumbles. "What time is it?"

"Midnight, I believe," Rose answers. What could Roxy want with both of them at this hour.

"Please, come with me, don't worry about appearances." Roxy looks over her shoulder cautiously. "There's something weird in the ballroom and they demand to see you."

"They?" John asks.

"Yeah, my horse, a ruffian, and a young girl."

"I thought we banned personal meetings for people who thought they were our daughter."

"That's the weird part!" Roxy exclaims a bit too loudly. "Karkat insists! And the girl totes looks like the mural, I'm not even kidding."

Rose knows that Roxy only spoke so informally when she was excited about something, and such excitement is contagious when it comes to the royal family. Rose turns to John and says, "What are we waiting for, then?"

John slips out of bed, then slips in his own socks, landing face-first on the ground. Both girls wince at the impact. He grabs the sheets for balance as he stands back up. "No one saw that."

"Saw what?" Rose asks.

"Exactly! Let's go!" He snatches his crown, which he keeps by his bed now because of the tiara being stolen the other day, and places it on his head. Rose does the same and carefully steps out of their ridiculously enormous bed. She believes that the money spent constructing this could have been spent doing something else.

They both hurry, following Roxy's lead to the ballroom, where everything is brightly lit and bathed in pale yellow. There, at the window, are two people, a blond ruffian and a young girl in a yellow dress with waist-length dark hair. Already, Rose could feel a pang in her chest. She looks over to John, who's staring longingly. They two young people didn't even notice they had guests, so Rose clears her throat.

They turn, startled. Rose cannot believe her eyes. The girl looks so much like her father it took her breath away, down to the corrective lenses. Before they banned the con artists from claiming they were the princess, not one had looked so similar. The girl let go of the ruffian's hand, approaching the king and queen. When she curtseyed, Rose saw it. When she was only a few months old, someone had broken in and cut the hair atop her head, which never grew back even though the rest of her hair still did, that is until the last time she was seen.

"What's your name?" John asks.

"Jade, after my eye color. I think?" The boy nudges her. "Your majesty."

Rose had to ask. "I must ask," she begins, unsure. "By any chance, when you sing..." she pauses.

"Does my hair glow?" the girl finishes. "I mean! Your majesty. Yes, it used to." She looks at the ground sheepishly. "But then it got cut and now it doesn't anymore. I was told that someone did it to me when I was a baby," she says, fingering the tuft on her head, "and then she took me somewhere never to be seen again!" she laughs nervously. Then she tilts her head. "Are you okay, your majesty?"

Rose blinks her tears away. "Yes, quite alright." She turns to John, who then walks toward Jade almost in a trance. Rose does the same, knowing now that this is the lost princess. The girl standing in front of them, no doubt, is their one and only daughter.

The family then descends into a flurry of hugs and snugs. Rose opens her eyes to see the ruffian boy hanging back awkwardly. She gestures him to join, holding out her hand.

"I'm not into hugs," he says simply.

"Get over here, Dave," Jade says.

"Yes, your highness," he says, getting in between her and John. He slaps Dave on the back, making him cough. "Does this mean I have a family now?"

Jade shoves him, laughing. Rose sneaks a peek at John, who may or may not approve of this union, now that they are thinking of it.

* * *

><p>Months later, Dave paces the altar, nervous as all getout. The ceremony is today and Karkat and Bec are nowhere to be seen, and they were supposed to get the ring from the royal jeweler or whatever. Sure, Karkat was busy running the town with Roxy as an equal, but his shift was supposed to have ended at dawn. That was an hour ago. Jade was spending some time on the roof, which he respected because finding out you're a princess and getting hitched in the same six-month time span was a lot to take in. The big doors at the front of the ginormous church open with a loud clang. He looks down the aisle, not really expecting to see the queen. He expected the king, but they probably already filled their manly bonding quota for the year when King John took Ruffian Dave to go hunting in the dead of night. Dave never liked killing animals for sport, but all the weird king did was prank him in the dark, like some sort of fear test. It was nerve wracking, because Dave fell for the same tricks over and over again like a chump. They never actually hunted anything last night.<p>

"So do I have to call you 'your majesty' or are you okay with 'ma'?"

Queen Rose laughs lightly. "Just 'Rose' is fine." She lifts her skirts so she could climb the two steps to the altar, where Dave is leaning up against it awkwardly, contemplating the one-hand lean or the classic arm-cross. He should probably do a double hand thing just in case the queen stumbles so he could push off the wall with speed, but she doesn't need his help. Hey, it doesn't hurt to be nice to in-laws. He finally decides to cross his arms when she is safely up those pesky stairs.

"I don't know if you remember, but you wrote a series of kid books," he rambles.

"Yes, I remember," she says. "It certainly would be strange if I did not."

"Okay, yeah. But you used to go to this one orphanage three towns away, like once a month and read to them. It was years ago, so..."

"Yes, I remember that as well. I also remember this one young boy who was so concerned about my books, that he was worried about the author herself."

"Y-you do?"

"I'll never forget the red eyes looking at me with such gratitude." She smirked. He's still wearing his shades, even inside these stone walls. So she does remember him. He can't stop the small smile growing on his face. He didn't think anyone would still remember him after so many years. It felt good.

"Well, yeah, you know it was me so I'm just gonna shut up and find Jade now." He turns on his heel, anxious to make a getaway and walks away. Right before he gets to the door that leads to the stairway to the roof, he stops, turning to Rose and says, "Thanks." Then he steals to the roof, where Jade is still sitting, watching the town. "Sup."

"Sup?" She turns to him questioningly.

"It's another word for hello."

"Oh. Sup." She turns back to the town.

Well, that backfired splendidly. He'll try again some other time. "Your mom's downstairs."

"She likes to come early to do things. I think I got my people watching from her."

"Makes sense." He groped for her hand and laced his fingers through. "Nothing like the witch who raised you."

"Ugh, not at all. I think I actually knew all my life that we weren't related. We looked nothing alike, and there were certain things about her that just rubbed me the wrong way. Silly me just wrote it off as puberty and rebelliousness." She shrugs. "I like this place better."

"Me, too." Since he had brought the lost princess back to her family, all of his sins were pardoned, much to Captain Lalonde's chagrin, and life seemed alright now. He wasn't being bullied by his roommates anymore, who were just serving jail time and might get out on good behavior in a few months, and he wasn't being chased around the countryside by an insane horse who wanted to be a knight. Life is actually pretty good, considering all the etiquette he has to learn after the… the... Jade interrupts his train of thought by leaning on his shoulder.

A few minutes, which seems like a few hours, pass by and Jade says, "I have to go get ready. I was supposed to be getting ready now, but I didn't want them to have time to put shoes on me."

"Yeah, shoes are overrated," he agrees, helping her up.

"Where are Karkat and Bec?"

"Still have no idea. They'll be here, I think." How hard could it be to pick up and deliver a ring? "Was it weird choosing a horse as a best man?"

"Not any weirder than choosing a chameleon as a maid of honor," she laughs.

"Very true."

"Hey Dave?"

"Yeah Jade?"

"Would it be weird to want to um… right now..."

"Nah." He leans down and brushes some hair behind her ear, planting his lips on hers. "We have the rest of our lives now."


End file.
